Since about January last year I'd had an awful intrusive thought that made me feel like a terrible person. It lasted a long time but for the past 4/5 months it was pretty much gone, like I could go weeks without thinking about it and when I do it's never a big deal.
But last night my inner monologue just sort of went "hey remember when you had intrusive thoughts?" and I was like "yeah haha" but it's not stopped doing it, like the intrusive thoughts aren't there and I'm not worrying about it being real anymore. It's just more the memory of the intrusive thoughts wont go away.
I did everything I usually do like not trying to make it go away but accept that it's there and I think it's helped me not freak out about whether it's true or not.
I dunno it's weird I can't describe it, I'm just worried of it turning into what it used to be if I keep thinking about it
I'm very scared of the fear around the intrusie thought coming back because I'm very busy at the moment, and when I have these thoughts I go into full depression and can't eat, do any work or exercise and it really affects my day
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