I am in a struggle with my OCD and I need some advice.

[TomT]

Thats the thing shark that is no omen, omens do not exist its just magical thinking working yourself up. As it means something bad your head is aware of it, turn it into something good make it your lucky number then your brain would stop caring. Another thing you can do is change the focus to another number and you will see how attention is managed by you.
Those two worked for me

[MyNameIsTerry]

With Magical Thinking, use a Behavioural Experiment. Set out to prove that you can't magically influence events which in turn proves no matter what you do, what will be will be.

I often mention how we think such unlikely things but forget that we all want to win the lottery yet thinking "I will win the lottery" achieves nothing but failure over & over again. Isn't that proof we can't do things with our minds?

There are so many opportunities to make something an omen. How many times have I walked past a streetlight for it to turn off. Did I drain the energy? No, because I don't feel any different and I know you can't switch them off like that anyway. But why only one in the row? I don't know, but I also don't need to know anyway as I'm not a magical being capable of achieving it...if I were you may see me on the X-Files at some point!

[TomT]

And put it thid way, terry mentioned the X files yesterday I saw the movie of the X files and Im hyped for the new season coming this january. What should I think this could be intepreted as a coincidences and I could be freaking out but its just that

[MyNameIsTerry]

And I said X-Files because anything strange or out of the ordinary in terms of our abilities could make it as a storyline...and that is a common association. Before then X-Files it was The Twilight Zone and somewhere in between, The Outer Limits. (and what about Eerie Indiana?)

Coincidence is everywhere if you look for it. You can say something and someone replies they were thinking about that yesterday.

It only ever means any form of harm because you attempt to attach one to it.

We also only look at it from our own experience and this is where other people like Tom come in handy because it shows it's not just us and then you need to think about how many more people it happens to thus making it more common and less meaningful.

If I think about my old History class today and next week bump into the teacher, what does it mean? What does it change or achieve? Nothing.

We are also not good at looking at these things and noticing the amount of time between them. If it happens straight away, you may think coincidence but the longer in between and the less it is and more so it is about your bias towards it.

[gatsby12]

You know, you guys are right. I need to challenge my thoughts for once. It feels just so scary though. On coincidence, i think my mind is actually looking for it and I can swear that things I have thought I have never seen before are really things I have.

This all seems like a big mental construct powered by fear the more I take a look at it. Now that I am calm from working out I can probably get down to brass tacks and start dismantling it.

Edit: I am starting to experience some serious deja vu

[MyNameIsTerry]

It really does look for it, sharkster. I had periods of paranoia when I was really bad and I can tell you that I'm nothing like that now. It's more challenging for you as you hav the autism to navigate through too but you can do it.

With the paranoia I would spend hours ruminating over what I said, what someone said, the physical clues to behaviour, what this email "really" meant, the hidden meanings behind words, etc. I did have some pressure here as I was fighting my employer at the time and they were playing dirty tricks (e.g. changing signed paperwork) which was a big cause but my anxiety levels of the time were the biggest cause of it all. Once you come out the other end you look back and see it more clearly. Your attitude changes.

I found learning Cognitive Distortion a big help to me. I learned to question things in a more guided way based on avoiding the traps in that.

[gatsby12]

This put everything in perspective for me

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZtQEXW0lVts

Mother****er, I keep seeing 11:11. Damn you B-MI.

---------- Post added at 18:52 ---------- Previous post was at 15:06 ----------

My thoughts are starting to recede as I keep working out. It has really, really helped me and I can not over recommend it for anyone having similar problems. I am starting to get more of a grip on my OCD.

My paranoia is starting to become more manageable the more I challenge and refuse to do my rituals. Who would frame me and what would they gain from it? The more I use my logic the more this seems like a smoke screen generated fear and guilt. Why would I go to prison? I have done nothing wrong and I try to keep my anger in check so thats out of the window. I have also tried to focus on the present instead of the past or the future which helps a bit.

[TomT]

I am glad we could help you out shark! The steps are clear, calm yourself down, use logic, learn ignore. works like a charm!

[gatsby12]

I am glad we could help you out shark! The steps are clear, calm yourself down, use logic, learn ignore. works like a charm!

I am on the path to recovery but its still gonna be a long road and going to be an effort to stay recovered. I am gonna stick around here. I about solved most of my problems and I can probably help people with similar problems. I took a bootleggers turn from where I was a while ago. The pain was intense and I wanted to stop living and I felt like my life was totally over but now I can see some light at the end of the tunnel here. I will have flare ups but I can manage it a lot better now. Talking about my fear helped so much because I felt alone and like I was a freak. Exposing my fear was probably one of the biggest factors that helped because I no longer gave it space to bounce around in.

[TomT]

The forum is all about that, helping each other and realizing you are not alone in this. We all had our ups and downs, but the most important thing I believe is reach out to others, share our experience and give a helping hand to the ones in need.


Anxious people UNITE haha