Please help..How to Stop Thinking??

[snowdrops]

Hi, I'm writing here because I'm in a really bad place right now. Well, have been for roughly 10 years.

I can't stop thinking and ruminating even though I know it's not helping me. Since I was about 13, for some unknown reason I began to think and live in my head constantly. I became paranoid about what others' thought of me and just felt completely detached from everything and cried a lot every day.

Sometimes my thoughts will get so extreme and complex, like at one point I was just looking at the top of my curtains and thinking "how am I going to ever going to be able to perceive the world/think normally like before I was 13, and why am I even looking at the curtains like a crazy person??" It feels like I've been analyzing constantly since that time but I don't know why and it drives me crazy not knowing. The fear that I'm slowly going crazy has increased over the past few years and is at its worse now.

I had that thought while I was sat trying to do a mindfulness practice which had helped me a lot previously but I just suddenly out of nowhere started to think about this kind of stuff and when I started I couldn't stop, despite KNOWING it couldn't be good for me (since mindfulness is all about seeing thoughts as passing mental events)

So why do I carry on? From a logical point of view, there must be SOMETHING my brain thinks it will get by thinking about things right? I don't know what to do..

[dedalus]

Hello there Snowdrops,

Sorry to hear that you're not doing well. Have you ever sought the help of a psychiatrist? There are drugs could help calm your thoughts. I have mixed feelings about medication to be honest with you. However, in your case they could help maybe.

I meditate regularly and try to practice mindfulness myself although if my mind is very busy it can be hard to reach a quiet place.

How is your sleep? How is the mood? Are you feeling tense/anxious/paranoid most of the time?

Dedalus.

[snowdrops]

Hi, thanks for replying. Yes I'm feeling tense/anxious all the time. To be honest I don't know how I dealt with it for so many years. I have tried anti depressants in the past though they didn't help. I've seen a few different psychiatrists as well but none really helped to stop me from obsessively thinking.
I just keep thinking about my existence, my thoughts and worried that they'll take over me and I'll go crazy. I don't know why I won't stop. I'm just really scared. I'm going to have a phone appointment with another psychiatrist beginning next month too.

[jimsmrs]

Try distracting yourself, reading, going for a walk or watch your favourite TV programme or film. Even some housework to music can help

[TomT]

Hello snow drops, welcome to the forum.

Its normal for people with anxiety disorders to desire thinking like the used to do before anxiety, the thing is that way of thinking is what lead you to anxiety.

Going insane is a pretty normal, and seen a lot here, fear for anxious people you cant go insane just by thinking it, people who are insane are detached from reality they do not worry going insane they just are. Worrying about that means you are ok.

What you are experiencing right now is racing thoughts another common topic here its oftenly related to intrusive thoughts and magical thinking. I honestly believe as I learned from another user you have to understand the science behind anxiety, its a normal response to stress, so and really practice this, instead of asking How do I stop this racing thoughts, ask yourself Why am I so stressed, which is my really worry behind all of this.
After you ask that question a few times you will realise your fear has no support in reality is just a bad predisposition to future events that haven't happen and there is no point in worrying about them.

This intrusive thoughts that you have going on will decrease when stress has decreased.

I will leave you my favorite quote regarding thoughts:
"Let your thoughts come in and leave, but never serve them tea"

I hope my answer has been of any help.

Tom.

[snowdrops]

Thank you for your answers. That makes a lot of sense Tom, thankyou. I feel a lot more relaxed now. I feel relieved to know that it's stress and anxiety making me have intrusive thoughts and not just me going crazy. I was starting to feel detached and questioning reality, things just seemed pointless to me like every day objects, is that normal too?

[TomT]

hey snowdrops, Im glad it helped you relax a bit.

Yes its totally normal its the whole Depersonalization effect caused by anxiety, its normal to feel every day tasks dull or meaningless during that period of huge stress, also you may feel detached from your own body, in those cases I would highly recommend putting your hands on cold water.

Questioning reality is a huge topic for everyone, that is called Solipsism(also a philosophy school), its presented in most of Pure-O and GAD anxiety sufferers, even people without anxiety have had this questions (Haven't you seen anyone after watching matrix?) The differences between us and them is that we tend to have them for longer periods and question them more deeply than people with no anxiety disorders, you may even feel that something is off with reality. Which is, then again, totally normal and is caused by anxiety. It seems to me you fit in the Pure-O type of anxious people (I belong there too) and have a lot of weird crazy thoughts coming at you which start to cause a of stress.

The best tip regarding this is, let them be, don't try to find the logic behind them that will make you engage the anxious thought and it will be like putting fuel in a bonfire.
You have had them for a long time right? And nothing in reality has changed you are still ok so maybe those thoughts have no power over you but cause anxiety and nothing more. Anxiety is harmless you will NOT go insane over this and you are not having any thought that could be of any concern in fact they are really normal.

Any question you know you have the forum and the suppport here you need.

Tom.