Feeling very low & hopeless

[Toby2000]

If you aren't familiar with my situation right now, read my previous posts. Well in short, I'm really nervous about my mum's health and her coughing makes me really both annoyed and anxious. Because she coughs quite a bit in the day and night and has done for months and months now this puts the idea of lung cancer into my head. This coughs increases/decreases depending on whether she has a cold or her smoking pattern, like if she gives up it'll start going away but then she'll start again and it'll return to normal. It's literally driving me insane and every time she coughs I feel sick and hopeless. I have a doctors appointment and a CAMHS appointment in a few days.

---------- Post added at 22:30 ---------- Previous post was at 20:57 ----------

Anyone? :(

[Oosh]

Fluid on the chest doesn't point to a life threatening disease Toby. It's normal for many people, ou're catastrophising. Recognise it when you're doing it. It'll make it easier to get a handle on it.

I've been chesty a couple of times in the past year, 'm fine.
My mums chesty, she's fine.
People everywhere are chesty, it's normal for the time of year.

Recognise how you're catastrophising and start strengthening that voice in your mind that calms you down. Bombard yourself with reassuring evidence that mums ok and everything's going to be ok, show yourself why.

Write your conclusions down and remember them. When you recognise yourself catastrophising remember the reassuring conclusions you came to and shush the anxieties telling you otherwise. With repetition you can strengthen it and make it dominant like anything else. You're developing a new thinking style and strategies to manage your anxieties.

[Toby2000]

Fluid on the chest doesn't point to a life threatening disease Toby. It's normal for many people, ou're catastrophising. Recognise it when you're doing it. It'll make it easier to get a handle on it.

I've been chesty a couple of times in the past year, 'm fine.
My mums chesty, she's fine.
People everywhere are chesty, it's normal for the time of year.

Recognise how you're catastrophising and start strengthening that voice in your mind that calms you down. Bombard yourself with reassuring evidence that mums ok and everything's going to be ok, show yourself why.

Write your conclusions down and remember them. When you recognise yourself catastrophising remember the reassuring conclusions you came to and shush the anxieties telling you otherwise. With repetition you can strengthen it and make it dominant like anything else. You're developing a new thinking style and strategies to manage your anxieties.

I don't feel like I have enough evidence though. Sometimes her cough is dry, sometimes it's wet. Sometimes she coughs at night too a couple of times. Plus my mum's a smoker. I just feel like I can't rationalize it anymore.

---------- Post added at 16:36 ---------- Previous post was at 15:50 ----------

I can't take this

[MissShoko]

If you aren't familiar with my situation right now, read my previous posts. Well in short, I'm really nervous about my mum's health and her coughing makes me really both annoyed and anxious. Because she coughs quite a bit in the day and night and has done for months and months now this puts the idea of lung cancer into my head. This coughs increases/decreases depending on whether she has a cold or her smoking pattern, like if she gives up it'll start going away but then she'll start again and it'll return to normal. It's literally driving me insane and every time she coughs I feel sick and hopeless. I have a doctors appointment and a CAMHS appointment in a few days.

---------- Post added at 22:30 ---------- Previous post was at 20:57 ----------

Anyone? :(

Hey Toby,

I know situations like this can be very frustrating. It's perfectly normal to feel hopeless, but you should realize that your mum hasn't been diagnosed with anything yet. You even pointed out that when she stops smoking her cough seems to decrease. If I were in your position, and your mum is willing, I would do all I can to help her quit smoking, since that seems to be the root of the cough. Maybe take her to a clinic/rehab center to get her some help, or be the support she needs and remind her that her health will get better if she quits. Remember though that you can only help her if she is willing to help herself first.

Best of luck, and take it easy.