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Thread: Autism

  1. #41
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    Re: Autism

    Quote Originally Posted by NoraB View Post
    The difference is that BB and Ponder both have an autism diagnosis. My issue with BB was his/her post-diagnosis attitude (which differed greatly to their 'norm' on here). (An autism diagnosis doesn't give us licence to treat people like shit)

    Ponder was here simply to bore everyone shitless with his 'musings' (And woe betide anyone who tried to stop him)

    The issues on this thread all started because Pulisa was trying to help BB and BB's response was both unnecessary and unpleasant. I felt bad for Pulisa because she's one of the nicest people on this forum, and she has problems of her own to deal with. (Plus, as an autistic, I don't care to see other autistics try and excuse their bad behaviour)

    BB chose not to stick around where he/she may have made a few friends. One of his/her complaints was of not having any friends. Well, attitudes like that are a sure way to make sure that you don't have any, right?

    Similarly, Phil chose to ignore us. More than that, he shut his entire thread down and along with it the many pages of people's time and effort. He was called out on his bigotry towards autistic people, and instead of sticking around to maybe learn something and change his opinion on the spectrum that autism is, he chose his offensive response. Before I placed him on ignore, I saw his comment on his Gambling thread (this thread has since been deleted) but not before he blamed everybody else for his behaviour. It was admin's fault for not locking the thread. It was our fault for 'going off topic', even though I don't consider suggesting autism as a possibility for his numerous issues and difficulties to be 'going off topic'.

    To sympathise with Phil is to enable his behaviour. That's what Ponder did with BB on this thread. (And I don't care if it's NT's doing the enabling or other autistics, it's not acceptable)

    This isn't just about Phil being unwilling to accept advice, Lenco, it's about his prejudice towards autistic people. Ignorance regarding autism I can understand. (I was ignorant about autism until my son was assessed) and Phil might have learnt something about autism (and himself) had he chosen to listen to people instead of throwing his toys out of the pram and then kicking the pram over.
    Mind you, I can certainly talk on occasions, especially as I can be rather opinionated over certain things, but I don't actually intend to 'bore people sh1tless' though, as certain issues that I personally find a cause for concern might seem relatively trivial and insignificant to others. But I do within reason try to look at other peoples' points of view on such certain matters and acknowledge that some of my views and opinions might not always be correct nor rational. For instance, I have had a bit of a thing about graffiti for many years now, but my dad admitted recently that he's now basically beyond caring about such issues, as he's got far more important things to be concerned about, especially my mom right now, though he obviously doesn't condone the serial graffitists going around recklessly tagging (and vandalism/ASB in general).

    And I agree with you about Phil and his alleged ignorance/prejudice towards us Auties, plus his endless pooh-poohing of the advice many of us on here took the time and effort to give him, though it's obviously not right for us to be 'ganging up' on Phil in this thread right now and 'talking about him and not to him', especially as he hasn't yet posted on it. Hence my cautious remark a couple of posts back about it probably being a bit non-PC.

  2. #42
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    Mar 2016
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    Re: Autism

    Quote Originally Posted by Lencoboy View Post
    Mind you, I can certainly talk on occasions, especially as I can be rather opinionated over certain things, but I don't actually intend to 'bore people sh1tless' though, as certain issues that I personally find a cause for concern might seem relatively trivial and insignificant to others. But I do within reason try to look at other peoples' points of view on such certain matters and acknowledge that some of my views and opinions might not always be correct nor rational. For instance, I have had a bit of a thing about graffiti for many years now, but my dad admitted recently that he's now basically beyond caring about such issues, as he's got far more important things to be concerned about, especially my mom right now, though he obviously doesn't condone the serial graffitists going around recklessly tagging (and vandalism/ASB in general).
    Get yourself to Manchester. The street art is something else. (Great for photography)

    Regarding 'boring for Britain', I can also drone on (and on) about things that interest/trigger me. (I bore myself on a regular basis). I have no doubt that I'm boring the pants off people on here when it comes to 'Diana', but it's an interest see, so I have a lot to say. (Best not to engage an autie on their interests lol)

    And I agree with you about Phil and his alleged ignorance/prejudice towards us Auties,
    Nothing 'alleged' about it, Lenco. It was all there in his own words. (Before he deleted the threads)

    Several of us tried to help him to see things differently, but he wasn't interested in what we had to say. (As per)

    though it's obviously not right for us to be 'ganging up' on Phil in this thread right now and 'talking about him and not to him', especially as he hasn't yet posted on it. Hence my cautious remark a couple of posts back about it probably being a bit non-PC.
    Nobody is 'ganging' up on Phil. (His prejudice re autism was challenged, and rightly so)

    It was his choice to refuse to engage with us and then delete those threads, and not because he was in any way remorseful for offending people, but because 'certain people' had taken his thread "off topic" etc. People might be wondering why those threads have disappeared and this answers that for them, that is if they happen to see this thread - which let's face it, most people (including Phil) won't bother with because it's entitled 'autism'.

    It wasn't me who brought Phil's name up on this thread, but I responded because I'm still very hurt by his 'opinion' of autistics. Maybe I shouldn't have responded to your comment, Lenco, but I did, and I am ok owning my own behaviour. (I will respect the mods if they feel I've crossed a line here)

    But I need to draw a line under this now. (And for my own MH wellbeing)

    I genuinely wish Phil (and his arse) well and I hope he is able to get a handle on his issues one day. I don't like putting people on ignore (it feels like a failure on my part) but I'm trying to see it for what it actually is - self-care.
    Last edited by NoraB; 15-10-22 at 06:52.
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  3. #43
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    Re: Autism

    Quote Originally Posted by NoraB View Post
    Get yourself to Manchester. The street art is something else.

    Regarding 'boring for Britain', I can also drone on (and on) about things that interest/trigger me. (I bore myself on a regular basis). I have no doubt that I'm boring the pants off people on here when it comes to 'Diana', but it's an interest see, so I have a lot to say. (Best not to engage an autie on their interests lol)



    Nothing 'alleged' about it, Lenco. It was all there in his own words. Several of us tried to help him to see things differently, but he wasn't interested in what we had to say. (As per)



    Nobody is 'ganging' up on Phil. It's his choice not to be here. It was his choice to make those comments and then delete those threads, and not because he was in any way remorseful for offending people, but because 'certain people' had taken his thread 'off topic' etc. It was his choice to talk about me, not to me. I spoke directly to him until it was clear that he was no longer reading people's posts. (Also, this thread is entitled 'Autism' so I don't expect he will have looked at these posts, or ever will)

    It wasn't me who brought Phil's name up on this thread, but I responded because I'm still very hurt by his 'opinion' of autistics. Maybe I shouldn't have responded to your comment, Lenco, but I did, and I am ok owning my own behaviour. (I will respect the mods if they feel I've crossed a line here)

    But I want to draw a line under this now; I need to do so for my own MH wellbeing. I struggle on a daily basis, not that I ask people for help very often. (I prefer to help others)

    I genuinely wish Phil well and I hope he is able to get himself to a better place one day. But he'd do well to start listening to people and also thanking them for all the time and effort they put into helping him.
    It was actually me that felt as if I may have been 'ganging up' on Phil as I brought up his name, despite a word of caution.

    But like you just said, it's probably best we draw a line under this now and move on.

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