Help .... Massive relapse

[Maisonsmum123]

I'm new to the site. Was told I had panic, anxiety and depression over a year ago and was put on 15mg mirtazipine. Which helped for a while but then my dose was out upto 30mg plus lorazepam as and when needed.

Been feeling very anxious and having several attacks a day these past few days and I'm scared of getting those "dark" thoughts as I'm a single mum to 3 children.
I currently feel like I'm having an out of body experience and my anxiety is through the roof. I'm scared to take half of lorazepam as I don't want it to wipe me out as I've got to look after my children. I'm so scared and frightened right now and I don't know what to do.... I think my period is making it worse and I just feel like I've no one to turn too

[Skkyee]

I feel your pain and know you are in good company here!! We all go through the this :-) I can't really comment of the meds as I haven't had to take any as yet, never say never tho.

This is my safe place, if I'm having low moments or dark thoughts.... This is where I come, someone here has felt it or thought it before me and come out of the other side.

Periods always make it worse, grit your teeth and sit tight, in a few days you will feel better.

The out of body thing is awful, u go on auto pilot and get the kids sorted, engage them in a movie or a game and just make it through the day :-) tomorrow will be better!

Get a friend or family member around if u need to take the meds, offer them a brew while they stay for an hour to see if your meds have the desired effect :-)

And hang out here, everyone here is helpful xx

Skkyee X

[wantpeace]

Have you been taking the lorazepam more often recently? If so, it might be that you're craving that. I had similar symptoms when I was craving it. My psychiatrist told me I had to start taking it regularly, then move to diazepam when the time was right to wean off it - which I'm on now. This does not mean this is what is happening to you.

You need to see a doctor ASAP. Can you book an emergency appointment? Preferably a psychiatrist, but a GP if not. Only they can tell you what the most appropriate action is for you.

The thing to remember is, there is help, this is just temporary, and you can and will get through this.

[sammie13s]

When you say out of body experience do mean everything's dream like? Xx

[Maisonsmum123]

I don't have any friends and family just don't understand and tell me to snap out of it. all I want to do is cry and I'm so scared of my own head and thoughts right now. I'm not thinking suicidal thoughts but I'm scared they could develop and I don't want to be taken away from my children.

---------- Post added at 13:29 ---------- Previous post was at 13:27 ----------

Have you been taking the lorazepam more often recently? If so, it might be that you're craving that. I had similar symptoms when I was craving it. My psychiatrist told me I had to start taking it regularly, then move to diazepam when the time was right to wean off it - which I'm on now. This does not mean this is what is happening to you.

You need to see a doctor ASAP. Can you book an emergency appointment? Preferably a psychiatrist, but a GP if not. Only they can tell you what the most appropriate action is for you.

The thing to remember is, there is help, this is just temporary, and you can and will get through this.

I havnt taken any lorazepam for a long time. I had cbt but it was only over the phone once a week and when it finished I was just left to it and told that's all I get

---------- Post added at 13:29 ---------- Previous post was at 13:29 ----------

When you say out of body experience do mean everything's dream like? Xx

It just feels like I'm somebody else, that it's not me. Like a dream

[sammie13s]

I think your suffering with derealisation/depersonalisation. It's on this forum. Have a read through it. I'm going through the same as you. It's because your anxiety is high xx

[lilann1012]

The out of body experience you're having is depersonalization or derealization, sorry on the spelling. Anyway, when my anxiety is high, I suffer from that experience too. It will get better. I really hate that symptom! I find if you read about it you'll find you're not alone and lots of people have issues with it.

Onto the lorazapam....my friend swears by it when she's having major panic. She takes it as needed too. I think it will make you more anxious to take it and worry about the kids so someone suggested a babysitter which would be a great idea. Are you afraid you will just get knocked out by it? I had a really good friend who stayed overnight when my daughter was a baby a few times when my anxiety was high. She got up with my daughter so I could sleep. I wasn't taking lorazapam but, I was new to meds and worried. After I knew how I would tolerate the meds I was fine and didn't worry anymore.

You don't need to explain your symptoms to your family or friends. They won't understand it if they haven't been through it. Try not to feel bad about it, justify how you feel or defend yourself. It is the way it's going to be for now. One of my biggest downfalls when I first dealt with my anxiety was talking to people about it.

Sorry you're having a bad time of it now, things will get better believe or not!