Bringing a friend to an appointment

[panicwomble]

I have been having some issues with TMJ/TMD and have had to refer myself privately to a specialist physiotherapist for assessment and treatment.

I am an extremely anxious person and for my doctor's appointments (unless its a routine visit to the GP), I tend to want to bring a close friend along in order to help me parse and interpret what the doctor says - because I tend to panic and freeze and then interpret everything in the most negative way possible.

For this reason, I asked this specialist before my first appointment if I could bring a friend to accompany me because I was an anxious patient, and the answer came back as a firm "No, we are unable to allow a friend to accompany you." They also said that the specialist would be able to assure and assist me. Pretty unlikely, given that they have NO idea just how I really am with these appointments!

They did not give any reasons for turning down my request. Anyway I went for my first appointment, which was only an assessment, no treatment, and it was a pretty harrowing experience, although the specialist was friendly, I focussed on anything negative that she said, and came away feeling 100x more anxious than ever.

I don't know whether it is appropriate to ask her again, giving my reasons, if I can have a friend sit in with me, because it would help me SO MUCH, or if I should just accept that it isn't ever going to happen???

Panicked

[MyNameIsTerry]

Yes, I think it's appropriate to ask again. They didn't assure and assist you as is needed and to be honest, how a physiotherapist thinks they can do that with little to no understanding of mental health disorders is just typical medical professional arrogance.

You are paying for this service, this means you don't have to put up with what the NHS tell you, you should expect the service you pay for. This gives you more ability to scrutinise the service you are receiving, although this will likely be difficult for you.

[ItchyOne]

Yes, you should ask again or change a specialist. Having a close friend beside is a source of comfort and I see no reason why the doctor would reject that request.
I often bring my wife along whenever I go for consultations.

[MyNameIsTerry]

I often bring my wife along whenever I go for consultations.

Exactly, it's common place for a spouse to be sitting with you. The support element is the same so why should it be different to bring a friend, BF, GF, etc for moral support?

[panicwomble]

Thank you for your replies. Since no one else thinks it is unreasonable, I will try and ask her again if I can bring a friend along because it would help me so much to have someone else listening in.

I am just so worried about appearing pathetic or unreasonable.

I am paying for private treatment, so yes this is a little surprising. I even thought that they allowed chaperones in NHS consultations so this surprises me.

It could be that she refused the request because the room is a little bit on the small side. However it is not so small that a third person could not sit in a chair in a corner.

I will cross my fingers and ask her again, please wish me luck!

Panicked