Veteran to Panic Attacks - Almost Recovered

[livefree83]

Hello,

I am new to this site and I wanted to introduce myself. I am a 32 year old female, married, 5 year old son. I joined this site to give encouragement to first time panic sufferers.

My first attack happened a little over a year ago after a bad reaction to an antidepressant medication, Paxil. I have bipolar disorder with mania. I did not know at the time that if you take an antidepressant alone without any other medication, it can put you in a manic state.

I went to my primary doctor since my anxiety was a little over the top and asked for paxil since I thought it would decrease my anxiety. She was a primary doctor, not a psychiatrist and I was not open with her about my bipolar history, therefore, she gave me the medication, I took it and did not know the consequences to come with it. That night, I took the paxil. about an hour later, I got very restless. Soon after that, it felt like there were electrical currents going through my body. I completely freaked out. I tossed the medication and did not take it after that. Thinking it was just a bad reaction (as it was) I figured I would return to my normal state before the paxil. The following night, I "relived" the same feeling. A few nights after that I experienced what I would later find out was my ever first panic attack, FULL BLOWN. I started getting weakness in my legs, short of breath, palpitations like never I had before, I was pacing back and forth trying to get as much air as I could. I called 911 about 20 minutes into this thinking I was having a heart attack, stroke or was going to have a seizure. The EMTS suggested I go to the ER just in case because my blood pressure was sky rocket and my pulse was 134. When I got to the ER, the symptoms started to go away. I was evaluated, had an EKG, blood work to rule out blood clots and other testing and they told me I experienced a panic attack.

When you first experience a panic attack, if you don't nip it IMMEDIATELY, it is a vicious cycle that will keep reoccurring because of the FEAR ITSELF. I lived this way for almost a year, multiple attacks a day. Then my hypochondria/health anxiety started to kick in. I started getting the following symptoms:

brain rushes/brain zaps
weak legs
tingling and numbness all over my body
short of breath
burning on the skin, especially my face and scalp/back
buzzing and vibrating sensations all over my body, especially in my head and chest
heart palpitations and PVCS/skipped beats
EXTREME sensitivity to light and sound
Depersonalization/Derealization
Tinnitus (which is buzzing and ringing in ears) that would not stop
adrenaline surges in my spine/back/up to my head
dizziness
brain fog/confusion
.....and the list goes on

I wasted almost a year of my life thinking I had everything from Multiple Sclerosis to brain anyerisums to heart failure to lymes disease .....everything in the book thanks to the website WEBMD!!!

I became full blown hypochondriac.

After Several ER visits, testing, EKGS Echocardiograms and bloodwork, everything came back NORMAL!

I finally came to terms after back up support from my husband, family, psychiatrist, therapist and friends that it was all ANXIETY.

Anxiety can bring on physical symptoms that you would not believe and YOU have to believe it CANNOT HURT YOU. I hate the expression when people say "it is all in your head" because it really is not, it is REAL but it CANNOT harm you physically. Like myself, I am sure many of you out there went through the same thing I did. Please don't let another day of your life be ruined because of it. I would go into full panic mode and have a full blown panic attack when something felt "wrong"

I currently take Klonopin daily. It is unfortunate I have to take a benzo daily but since I had the reaction I did to the paxil, it was the only alternative. It helps me and when I am 100% recovered from the traumatic event of the paxil incident, I will begin my taper from the klonopin....that is down the line and probably will be a whole other story for those who have experience with benzo tapering. My point is I am living for NOW and realizing that if I am not irrational and don't GIVE IN TO FEAR, then nothing will happen.

I really hope my story helped some people. Stay strong! I still struggle with anxiety but stay calm, stay rational and take each day at a time.

Stay positive

[venusbluejeans]

Hiya livefree83 and welcome to NMP

Why not take a look at our articles on our home page, they contain a wealth of information and are a great starting place for your time on the forum.

I hope you find the as site helpful and informative as I have and that you get the help and support you need here and hope that you meet a few friends along the way

[livefree83]

Thank you so much! I am glad to be a member of the site. I will use as many resources as I can and I am also here to help others. I am a long term sufferer of panic disorder and I know how hard it can be for people going through it the first time. I am here for extra support and also here to help people. Thanks for the warm welcome

[helloworld]

Hi live free...

Thanks for your post, which I can totally relate to... I went through a rather similar exeprIence, also about a year ago, during a really stressful time in my life....

Am also on the mend now and hoping to fully recover!

All the best,
Mark

[Alio]

Hi,
I have suffered for the past 4 years. I started with a horrendous panic attack where I ended up going to A&E. I had various tests, saw a counsellor and even tried a hyponotherapist in a desparate attempt to get better. I ended up having 12 weeks off work which was something I absolutely hated as I had never had time off like that before. After that first attack, it took weeks before I could talk about it properly to my family. My mum just didnt understand why i couldnt put mind over matter and concentrate on my children and husband. At the time i was just concentrating on staying alive! And 4 years later I know I must have looked like a crazy person. I have been on paroxetine for 4 years but lately suffered 3 big attacks. I am so scared of going back down with this. The fear overwhelms me and I fixate on any little pain in my chest, I feel I can't breathe deeply and my throat feels like it closing. I fight with myself to stop me rushing bacj to A&E. I know I sound nuts and when I am thinking rationally, I know I am fine. I will beat this, or I may just learn to live with it. I honestly think that it helps to hear other peoples experiences.