'Jelly on the plate'....
Hi everyone - wasn't sure if this should go in 'Successes' or somewhere else! What on earth makes you think I have a problem with decision-making?!
Anyway, thought I'd just share a little bit of me with anyone that might want to listen!It's rather lengthy I'm afraid - sorry!
I never really thought I had a major problem with Social Anxiety - until recently. Oh, I've had occasions where I've turned and run from situations that would require me to talk to strangers away from my comfort zone (i.e. anything away from my circle of friends and family!) And I knew I had a bit of a problem with self-confidence.
Well, four weeks ago I decided I needed to take up some sort of keep-fit regime (granny doesn't want to reach for the Deep Heat quite yet!) as I was feeling somewhat 'out-of-condition'.
Normally I would swim (which I love!) but that would entail getting wet and squeaky and trying to get changed in a cubicle the size of an average broom cupboard! Have no desire whatsoever to go back to a gym, especially after the last time when I set the ruddy treadmill to what I thought was a comfortable, slow jog only to find myself huffing and puffing as I tried, in vain, to stay on it!! Felt as though I had been transported straight onto the set of a Tom & Jerry cartoon!! Nope, too much hassle - I wanted something quick and instant.........and above all totally enjoyable. And I've found it - Belly Dancing!!!
Are you all still awake?!
I hadn’t planned to go on my own but my friend who was going to come with me couldn’t make it – so off I went. As I neared the sports centre where the classes were being held, the old familiar stomach-churning and cold sweats started. And they got even worse when I went up to the reception after walking the gauntlet of petite, tanned young ladies and sporty muscle-toned young men, to ask in a whisper where the belly-dancing classes were being held !!! All I could think of was what these fit young things were thinking of a granny who wanted to belly-dance!! Anyway, (I am trying to keep this short but I’m not doing a very good job am I?!) I found the room, froze on the spot cos I wanted to run – but took a deep breath opened the door and walked in with hands shaking and heart thumping! I couldn’t believe I was actually doing all this – but I was driven!! I went up to a couple of ladies and introduced myself and found out they were just as nervous as me !! Needless to say, the sweats and palpitations began to subside and eventually disappeared altogether!
Now, put all thoughts of a sleazy Kasbah out of your minds cos it's nothing like that!!
It's great! For an hour a week I get to forget everything and put all the wobbly bits I have accrued over the years to good use! What a blast, what a workout and what a laugh!! And, even better, I don't have to try and get rid of the wobbly bits! (Apologies to any blokes who might be reading, just skip that part!) I would recommend this form of keep fit to anybody!
Now, to the point of my novel. I know I wouldn’t have been able to do any of this if I hadn’t learned such a lot from being ill from anxiety and panic. This is an occasion where I used it to my advantage and won - and I hope it will serve to encourage somebody else! But I couldn’t have done that without bringing to the forefront of my mind everyone on NMP and how such difficult situations are overcome with blood, sweat and not a few tears sometimes.
I have received from everyone who uses this website a lot more than I have given and I will always be eternally grateful. This is not the first time NMP has got me through, and I’m sure it won’t be the last – thank you.
Lotsa luv …. GG
xx
PS: I’m so glad my 30th wedding anniversary is today not tomorrow – Tuesday night is Granny’s Nite and there ‘aint nothin’ going stand in the way lol!
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