hello everyone,

i started a new job in January as a learning assistant in a school and so far i am really enjoying it. However I have just been asked to go on a school trip this Tuesday and I need to let the school know tomorrow morning if i can go (currently i only work mornings and do another job in the afternoon/evening. The trip is a full day trip so i would need to work overtime if i went).

I am now in complete panic mode. I don't feel ready to go on a school trip especially not a full day one and to make things worst the school are taking public transport to the zoo which is a big trigger for me. I feel really trapped and nervous getting a bus into town and that is when im travelling for leisure, the pressure doubles when it's for work cause i can't just get off the bus when i feel like it (or if fight or flight kicks in). That makes me feel even more trapped.

However i feel anxious approaching this subject with the headteacher, who currently does not know about my anxiety. I know it would be easier to just make up an excuse and say sorry i cant go im working in my other job and cant get out of it but if i do that it's only a matter of time before i get asked to go on another school trip. I also want to increase my school hours and if i get the go ahead i won't be able to use my other job as an excuse to get out of future trips. I feel like i need to let the school know about my anxiety now before more problems arise but i am also terrified in case it is a problem and they decide it is an essential part of the job i cant get out of. im also worried that they won't understand and will just say "you'll be fine, don't worry you can do it", not realising that anxiety and panic attacks cause me to become physically very unwell to the point I can't leave my house.

In my last job i was discriminated against because of my anxiety and they knew about my anxiety before i even signed my contract. I am terrified that the same thing might happen again or that i will be forced to leave a job i really enjoy because of my panic attacks and anxiety. I just don't know how to approach the situation and what to say.

Help!