I Went for A walk

[Rain]

I was in the nomorepanic chat room yesterday and we were talking about my agoraphobia and social anxiety. I haven’t been for a walk for 7 months now. People were asking me what specifically I thought would happen if I panicked on a walk and I said I fear that my legs will go weak and I will fall over. We discussed this a bit more and agreed that falling over on a public road wasn’t the end of the world. The feeling started to come over me that I could do it and I said goodbye and put my coat on and went out and walked for about ¼ of a mile to the end of my lane. I can’t say I enjoyed it but the panicky feelings stayed low level. On the way back I had to go up a steep hill and was getting a little bit out of breath and my chest got a bit tight, but I was still Okay.
Suddenly I saw my neighbour standing in his garden openly gaping at me. I thought, ‘Not now’, but kept walking. As I drew level he started shouting at me about the state of the road (he blames us because our builders had to dig part of it up). He is a very ignorant person and always stares openly at anyone who walks past. I managed to get past him and got home.
I was delighted that I had been out for the first time in 7 months, but upset that he had spoiled it and caused my panic levels to get quite high. I would like to try and walk to the end of the lane again on Monday. I have been thinking about this and realise that annoying neighbours are part of life and I can’t let him stop me. But how do I stop myself from getting really anxious when I start going up the hill, knowing he may be there to accost me again?
Thankyou to the nomorepanic members who encouraged me to do it. It really makes a difference having kind folk to talk to who understand just what you are experiencing.

[Piglet]

Rain - a very well done to you hun

I identify with you totally - please do have a read of my thread 'I lay down on the pavement today' there might be bits you can take from it.

Also if you get chance we had a great thread running about 'The house of agoraphobics'. Did you ever see that on the tv before Xmas?

Piglet

[jo61]

Well done Rain. That's the hardest bit going out. At least you did and coped with the neighbour. Just accept that he is ignorant and it's not personal. He probably shouts at the builders too and they probably reply with some colourful language! Small steps and you'll get there.

[Jaco45er]

WELL DONE RAIN

And next time, tell that neighbour if he annoys you again, I will come over and annoy him the muppet.

That was a big step, you should be proud girl )

Take care

Jaco

[Granny Primark]

WELL DONE RAIN

Im attempting something I thought id never do cus of a post on misc that i read today.
I have just entered the Race for Life. I will be walking 5km with my friend and my daughter who will be 6 months pregnant and her friend.

Take care
LYNN xx

[JulieAs45]

SO PROUD OF YOU!

Rain

I am so proud of you cos I was there when we were having this conversation. I cant believe what you did Rain it was amazing. Wow!

When next you walking towards your neighbor and he sees you, throw yourself on the floor wave your arms and legs in the air like a complete nutter until he goes indoors!! Hopefully every time he see you coming he will run indoors to avoid you! This will also help with feelings of losing control in public so kill two birds with one stone!!!

Keep it going Rain cos what you did took so much courage and would be a shame if it didnt continue.

Well done again hun!
Julie xxxx

(((((((((hugs)))))))))

[JulieAs45]

Message for lynn!

Well done for doing Race for Life hun!!

I did it last year and can honestly say that it was a real test for me but walking around with all those people with signs on their back saying "running for my dad, mum, kids" etc, people they have lost to cancer spurred me on no end and was worth every single panicky feeling.

At the end of the race you will feel amazing there no other feeling like it a real sense of satisfaction that you have completed it and that you have helped lots of people as well.

Best of luck with it! I doin it again this year and dont care if I panic all the way it worth it!!!!

Julie x

[PUGLETMUM]

whayhey thats a fantastic acheivement DO NOT LET YOUR GRUMPY OLD NEIGHBOUR STOP YOU!!!!!

you may get anxious again coming up the hill, but you will be able to deal with it, and he probably wont be there next time even though you may anticipate it. well if he is just ignore him or tell him to get lost!!!

emmaxxxxxx

[Freaky Chick]

Hi Rain

WELL DONE!

You did the most important thing, and you did it on your own, and the panic feeling was low.

Remember that feeling, that - i did it, i walked outside, and it was nice - write it somewhere, so that you can look back on it and say - yes that was good, something i did for myself.

Don't throw the thing in the bin, just becasue of the silly guy next door - he was only a small part of the experience, and 99.9% of it was good. Don't let it get you down for the 0.1% that was horrid.

You will be able to do it again, and hang the neghbour - if the road bugs him that much, let him pay and get it fixed!!!!

I'm rally glad you made it outdoors - i remember what it was like the first time i walked to the post box - it's a great feeling, hang on to it.


Love Freaky Chick.

[jude uk]

Yea rain I was in the chat room when you spoke about it and I was so pleased that you took that walk. It may be that this neighbour has a problem with many of the other neighbours. Have you spoken to them about it? If it is becoming a problem it may be worth talking to your local council but I would also try and get feed back from your other neighbours. This person cannot be allowed to act in this way and you are feeling more sensitive because of how you feel.

Will be thinking of you and hope things get better

Once again WELL