Insecurity and confusion

[elik]

Just another forum to post in for me....
I am so insecure and have no sense of self, I know this. However, knowing this I want to work on it but I seem to be consistently set back. Shifting from one anxiety to the next giving me no sense of achievement from overcoming the last. I don't understand people, I am a well known push over and people pleaser. I don't have a problem doing things to make others happy, it's what I like, but I find that when I don't succeed I take things incredibly hard and it makes me feel scared of people and I want to meet everyone's needs (not possible I know) so I am an incredibly understanding person and will let people get away with a lot more than the average person because I feel everyone's human and there's a reason for their actions. This in turn makes me vulnerable to being used which has happened a lot in my life and I will still back their corner. For some reason I just have got more scared of friendships etc and more conscious of what people think of me and that if I receive a negative I will go into despair so I'm pulling away from people. My opinion seems invalid and I feel if I try and test myself and say no from time to time it seems to backfire on me so I just lose the will in how to win.........

[HalfJack]

When you're trying to progress but there's a lot in the way it can be very overwhelming and frustrating. I know how you feel, social anxiety can be so tricky to deal with and it's often unclear how to help yourself. I know I need to be more assertive too but sometimes it's hard to know when or how.

When I feel like that I try to break it down into chunks. I think about what I need to change and how? If things get in the way I deal with those first. Making a list might help?
I started a diary on here so I could keep track of the progress I made, rather than constantly feel like I made none. Really helped me.