sober recovery has helped my recovery but its boring

[ohwell123]

hi hope your all well Ive abstained from alcohol now for 5 weeks im 33 years old and this has been one of the most difficult periods of my life

simply because everything revolves around alcohol meals cinema holiday after work drink etc especially to 20 to 40 year olds

take my advice on this aswell 90% of your friends are friends through alcohol ive learnt that in the last month

alcohol to anxiety sufferers is like trying put a fire out with 100 octane fuel
but great at the time instant cure A and E the day after on a massive panic attack

take a look at S.M.A.R.T recovery guys its for people who have a physcological need for alcohol and not actually addicted to alcohol

its to do with associating drinking action and decision the negative thought pattern and changing that pattern

anyway ive got no anxiety writing this infact its dying a slow death which is great however im bored shitless, no point me going out with friends ive done it before and im bored within 30 minutes hours used to pass by with 8 pints

never mind onwards and upwards

rgds ohwell

would rather be bored than sitting in a and e having a panic attack

[pulisa]

It takes great strength and courage to quit booze and stick with it especially when friends carry on drinking and provide all sorts of temptation to just have one etc etc

You are choosing to protect your mental and physical health and know how false a friend booze can be

[KeeKee]

If friends are only friends through alcohol then they aren't true friends. Not as many people seem to go out drinking now as opposed to when I was a teenager (I'm 27) and people seem to be drinking less at home too. I haven't had a drink in over 3 years but still meet up to go for tea etc. My partner meets his friends for football etc. I don't understand why some people can't have fun without it. I'd much prefer a nice meal over drinking and acting like a fool (as I used to drink to get drunk, can't stand the taste).
Surely you enjoy other things too? You not got some favourite TV programmes to catch up on? Are you the type of person to read? Do you have any friends you can go out for a meal with?

[Mojo61]

I know what you mean. It seems that people can't seem to enjoy themselves unless there is alcohol involved. I lost a lot of "friends" when I quit alcohol 10 years ago, but as Pulisa says, if they were true friends they would still be there for you, alcohol or not.

[ohwell123]

i don't know if its more of an area thing? in the west mids most 20 to 40 year olds i know drink through the week and drink even more on the weekends infact i only know one tea total lad and that's only because it made him take heavy drugs

ofcourse its not till you stop drinking you realise how many people also stop contacting you

if i was to say to a "friend" fancy doing something different theyd probably go into some kind of shock don't get me wrong i have a fantastic partner and daughter so don't picture me as a recluse lol

thanks for the positive comments just making it clear how hard it is to fill the time that would have flown by socialising with the USe of alcohol, even playing the guitar becomes a bit monogumus after half hour lol

[KeeKee]

Maybe it is an area thing. Not to say people my age don't drink of course but not as often as we did when we were in our teens. I think for some people too (like me) alcohol has never been stress relief. If anything it caused me to feel more depressed and I don't miss it in the slightest. That being said I was only ever a 'social' drinker. I drank to open up to people and now that I have no urge to socialise there is no point in drinking.

[fishman65]

I can relate ohwell, I've now been married for 20 years and have been mostly sober in that time. From my late teens up until meeting my wife (I was 30 then), alcohol had been my life. If closing time came round and I was only a bit tipsy, I would think something was wrong and rush a few drinks down. I drank to get drunk, no other reason. Back then, the idea of spending a Saturday night not drinking heavily was totally alien to me, whole weekends would go by in a blur.

My wife finally gave me an ultimatum after about 6 months of us being together, the drink or her. From that point on I cut down to the extent where now I barely drink alcohol at all. I like gardening and writing poetry and the longer you keep clear of booze, the easier it gets but I believe you need to fill that void with something else. Sport, exercise etc or whatever steers you clear of the alcohol culture. You are doing really well so give yourself huge credit buddy.

[Buster70]

Hi , you've had a rethink on alchol then since your other post when you mentioned people who despise it being wrong , I drank from 14 to 40 and loved it but when the anxiety struck after meds been sober for four years , I now drink a couple and enjoy them but don't go as far as to get drunk it just messes me up for days , lost touch with my mates but had a good run and lot of good times in drink but you are right this times it's no good for anxiety or depression these days not everybody drinks it's a dying art we just have to find new hobbies , take care .

[Fishmanpa]

alcohol to anxiety sufferers is like trying put a fire out with 100 octane fuel

A BIG to you for abstaining. What you stated is my heartfelt belief as well. If you can handle alcohol with mental illness, good for you but I've seen way too many post the detrimental effects of alcohol on their anxiety and if you're on meds, it's highly recommended you don't drink. Every med listed in the Medication forum as moderate to severe reaction and alcohol + benzos can be fatal.

I get it about the boring part but like you said... Better to be bored as opposed to sitting in the ER having a a panic attack. Keep up the good work!

Positive thoughts

[Sunflower2]

I haven't drank any alcohol in 4 years and before that I only really had a small amount when out with friends. It's not made any difference to my social life except now I don't get forced to go to sticky disgusting nightclubs! Alcohol really doesn't agree with me and I don't ever feel the need to have any. Even at parties I have just as much fun as every one else and after a certain point in the evening people stop noticing as well. It gives you the freedom to drive whenever you want too, as well as feeling bright and fresh in the morning after a party!