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Thread: First day and it feels awful- is there HOPE?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2013
    Posts
    100

    Unhappy First day and it feels awful- is there HOPE?

    Hello all,

    It's been 3 years since I have actively been on the forum, and in that time I've had a manageable time with my anxiety, controlling bad flares as needed but in the past few weeks I have gone to a very dark place with my anxiety and panic disorder and have finally said yes to an ssri.

    Yesterday (Aug 21) was my first dose of escitalopram (5mg). Within 2 hours I was so fatigued, weak, light headed. My head felt a bit woozy or cotton filled as my cousin says. I was overwhelmed with nausea & upset stomach. These feelings persisted for about 11 hours then dropped off somewhat.
    When it was time to sleep I found my mind racing, but I fell asleep around midnight. At 2:30am I woke up in a wave of nausea and a panic attack. Jittery legs. Hot flash.
    I took .75mg of Ativan (lorazepam) and managed to fall back asleep until 8:30am.

    I have not taken my 2nd dose yet, but still feel nauseated. And a bit muddled.

    I reached out to the clinical pharmacist who works in tandem with my doctor and she suggested I could try to see how I handle 2.5mg. She also suggested trying to take it later in the day in hopes that I would sleep through some of the crummy feelings.

    My fear is, then when I titrate up, will the sideeffects be just as bad, or am I then giving my body a better chance to adjust? Should I just stick with the 5mg and try to ride it out for a few days?

    It feels just awful.

    I am having a really hard time eating the past 2 weeks. Just keep chewing on TUMS (calcium tablets) and once in a while having half a banana or some crackers. This nausea from the meds is not helping the cause.

    So I guess I'm wondering if someone can give me hope that they were that bad with side effects and it resolved quickly and they now feel great or if someone can say if they have had a good experience going from 2.5 to 5 to 7.5? Anything positive please!

    Anddddd can someone please tell me that I will want to eat again???

    (Stats if they are at all helpful. I am 32-years-old. 5"0. 140lb)

    Thanks

    -Dora

    Sad to be back, happy there's a place to come back to

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Posts
    2,389

    Re: First day and it feels awful- is there HOPE?

    5mg is a pretty low dose, isn't it? I think I'm on 20 mg right now.

    I started at ~5mg when my GP prescribed it...basically he told me to take 10 mg every other day. When I went to the psych he told me to take 10 daily, then later he bumped me up to 20.

    Honestly, here's how it went for me:

    ** When I was taking the 10 mg every other day, I felt 'side effects'. I don't really know if they were real or just because I was expecting side effects, if that makes sense. They were just kind of weird...I felt like I had a sunburn one day all over my body. But after a few days they went away completely.

    ** When I started taking 10 mg daily, I really did have side effects. Nausea was hard for me because I hate feeling like that and I couldn't eat much. I'd also feel really shaky...I wouldn't physically shake, I just felt like I was shaking. I began to worry about things that normally I wouldn't; I remember having a massive fear that by going on a hike with my dog that I had given him lyme disease and would lose him forever. Sometimes I'd feel really anxious for no reason at all. I didn't have much trouble sleeping, thankfully.

    ** But, when I bumped up from 10 mg daily to 20 mg daily I seriously didn't notice any side effects. None.


    As of right now, I've been on the meds since about February. I went through a period where I felt really great - seriously, I'd still "think" the same anxious thoughts but I was able to cope with them so, so much better. My anxiety has since sort of returned, but there are other reasons for that and I'm still getting good at coping.

    Side effects right now are mainly just vivid dreams...which I have to say I don't mind. They're not nightmares, just very elaborate and I remember them in the morning. It's like watching a new movie every night. I don't mind them, really.

    I do have one other thing that I'm anxious about and quite possibly could be caused by the meds BUT it's not confirmed and may not be an issue so I won't post about it here unless it IS confirmed (no need to scare you with my fears!)
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  3. #3
    Join Date
    Aug 2011
    Posts
    5,160

    Re: First day and it feels awful- is there HOPE?

    I've been on 20 mg on two different occasions and it honestly helps me so much ... I feel like a **normal** person for once.. my obsessive thoughts have quieted. Most side effects I experienced passed within 1-2 weeks, the difficulty sleeping I experienced lasted a bit longer (maybe a month). I felt like the worst side effects were when I first started, some would come back on increasing doses but not as severe.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Posts
    2,449

    Re: First day and it feels awful- is there HOPE?

    I started on 10mg from the get go, and have remained on 10mg for the past 13 years. I found the start up effects horrendous personally, but things DO get better.

    I felt very nauseous, had no appetite and my anxiety heightened. I also had panicky and often weird and whacky thoughts and terrible nightmares. I also felt very, very tired and fatigued.

    Don't worry, or try not to anyway! These side effects are par for the course and totally normal. The only thing is - as Poppy said - 5mg is a very low dose and you shouldn't feel quite as bad as you do. Usually a lower starting dose and slow increases help the transition into taking meds, but I have heard other members here have the same experiences as you with low doses, so it isn't unheard of.

    My advice would be to stick at the 5mg. Meds are a lot harder to deal with and get used to when the dosage is mucked around with too much, and there is no consistency. It will be tough for a while, but within weeks generally, you should start feeling way better, but of course you are still in the process of reaching/finding the optimum dosage for YOU PERSONALLY, and everyone is different with meds doses. It is very subjective.

    Try not to worry hon. Whatever the case, you will get to feeling better. This is just a necessary storm you have to get through to reach the other sunnier side. xx

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2016
    Posts
    261

    Re: First day and it feels awful- is there HOPE?

    Hi,

    I'd say stick with it and go very slow. These drugs do heighten anxiety and you will find that's where all the random thoughts come from. My anxiety was through the roof through too many dosage changes so when my dog sat in front of me I thought, he knows I'm dying and he's come over to comfort me!!! Then I realised it was 7.30pm and he gets a biscuit at that time, clearly he'd set his alarm clock. As Debs71 says consistency is key, I am on citalopram which has worked brilliantly for the main part of 12years. I may need to switch soon and I am sensitive to changes so you may just be the same.

    Slow and steady wins the race x

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Mar 2013
    Posts
    100

    Re: First day and it feels awful- is there HOPE?

    Thanks all!

    My doc suggested to go even lower. 2.5mg to start for 5-7 days then we'll titrate up by a quarter as we go... 2.5 to 5 to 7.5 to 10.

    I am about to take pill 3 and really the nausea/pseudo dizziness is the worst. Couple with my lack of appetite. (The anxiety had already made me barely eat, now the side effects from the SSRI are just compounding)

    Thank you so much everyone who weighed in.


    Esp @debs71 for saying your S.E. were horrendous. It gives me hope.

    I just wish wish wish there was a more definitive answer/end of the tunnel. (IE- on day 4 your side effects will go away!) Darn us all for having different bodies that respond so differently to these things.

    I need a lot of hand-holding right now.

    I really appreciate everyone who says "It sucks, I know. Stick with it." And try to not secretly resent my body for all the people who say "I had no side effects" or "I was a little tired, but was otherwise good." hahaha

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jun 2016
    Posts
    261

    Re: First day and it feels awful- is there HOPE?

    It's rotten and I have had 6 dosage changes in 8 weeks so I know your side effect distress. I've had so many ups and downs my anxiety is through the roof.

    It'll be worth it when you get through the side effects, I keep telling myself that!

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Nov 2003
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    Re: First day and it feels awful- is there HOPE?

    I took my first dose of 5 mg yesterday and although I did experience tiredness and slight dizziness, overall it made me feel really good: much happier and brighter. However, at nighttime came panic, and I've been feeling awful all day today. My mind is racing with thoughts, I feel so tense and I've got severe depersonalisation. :(

    I'll be on 5 mg for another week before I up my dose to 10 mg. I really hope the medication works, and the tension is unbearable...

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