Hi, I'm currently caught up in a debilitating health anxiety downward spiral.
This one started off with seeing something red on the tp after wiping. I had eaten red foods in the days previously but that wasn't enough to chase away the intrusive thoughts. I've searched all my old posts and I have posted about this same thing happening a few times before, about 5 years ago.
Now this has turned into an obsession and going to the bathroom brings huge anxiety and compulsions. I can't stupid checking for anything untoward in my stools 😳😳so much so that I have even taken stools from the toilet to check! Sorry TMI I know. I can't believe what this has done to me, I'm ashamed.
I am a 50 year old mother of 5, I have 3 grandchildren, one of which was born a week ago and hellish anxiety has cast a shadow over what should be a joyous time. I've also been through a particularly stressful time with my 30 year old son who has bpd and narcissistic traits. He is a prolific self harmer and is addicted to prescription drugs and has psychotic like episodes which seem to be getting closer together. This last week has been hell with him massively harming himself.
If anyone has any suggestions on how I can curb the checking I'd really appreciate it. I can't go on like this 😪😪