Back after 4 years 😔

[paula 86]

Last time I was here was 4 years ago. Iv had panic attacks and anxiety on and off for 10 years. 4 years ago was my last real horrible period of panic and anxiety. Started on my citalopram again and after a while it worked wonders. Now in the last month or so iv started 2 have slight panicking feelings nothing major. Now 4 days ago it's hit me like a bus again, can't eat or sleep properly but it's the butterflies in my stomach constantly that are making me so much worse. I am so so scared of having 2 move up a dose on my tabs or change 2 something else because of a bad experience going up doses. I guess I'm just looking reassurance that I will get over it again without messing with my meds. Also any advice on herbal products teas etc or anything else that could help without going 2 30mg citalopram or changing altogether. Thanks so much xx

[SLA]

Hi Paula,

Congrats on the 4 years, that is STRONG. I don't think I've done that long without a significant wave of anxiety to weather. So that is impressive.

Can you point to anything in your life that might have triggered it?

A cold/flu, changes in sleep/diet, life changes?

Jason

[paula 86]

Hi Jason thanks for the reply. No I can't think of anything major that's happened. I find work quite stressful sometimes but I didn't think it could start all this off again. Also a while back something awful happened 2 people from my area and I remember having my 1st proper panic attack thinking what if it happens 2 me, I think things hAve maybe started 2 go downhill from there. I'm just so worried about having 2 up my meds or change, I just pray this could be a phase that will pass, do u think that's possible?

[SLA]

It can definitely be a phase. You have to learn to manage it though, and stay on top of it.

The medication is there to make it easier, not to eradicate it entirely.

You need to break the cycle of worry, and start feeling better about yourself. Easier said than done, but start off small.

Start by reflecting on how well you've done for 4 years. Use that as your motivation to know that you can do another 4 years.

There will be blips along the way, but you can do it!

[Super_Freaked]

your doing pretty damn good 4 years and you have a pretty good grasp on this thing a few days setback is nothing. You mention herbal teas and things, camomile (spelling) is calming for nerves, so is warm milk at bedtime. I like to watch boring movies at night when i can't sleep as they make me sleepy, getting up and accepting your not sleeping and doing something creative or making future life goals has helped me... I think more than anything ever is exercise to the point of exhausting myself everyday. As for eating i get that too so sometimes i will make myself shakes or even result to those "meal in a can" for old people so i at least know i am getting some nutrients, it sucks not eating too wears your body down of essential things it needs to heal and be strong so do your best to get them down your throat one way or another, sometime when i can't eat i am surprised how well i do with plain white room temp rice for some reason you have a big bowl and keep picking at it, i can always force down liquid so that is why shakes work for me

[eternally optimistic]

I too am congratulating you like SLA has.

Take comfort in that this is a slight relapse and can be recovered from.

Take care - I know how disappointing a blip can be.

[Colin44]

Back after 2 years having thought I was 'cured'.


Try and stay mentally strong and think back to how you felt when you were good.

[DoraFlora]

4 years (or 2 in your case Colin44) is quite commendable.

It is absolutely frustrating to think this might be with us in some form forever. But like so many others who deal with chronic issues, there are moments of flare-ups and remission. Moments of frustration and other moments you forget entirely that you have it all.

I had a severe panic attack in August (worst I've had. Ambulance was called to take me to ER) and the paramedic said something to be that I am trying really hard to take to heart/incorporate in my life.

He said kids in school have fire drills. They practice lining up, going outside, finding the meeting place, etc. They practice (when there is no fire) so that IF a fire does happen they can use what they've learned to get out of the building safely. Albeit it might not go as smoothly as the practice runs, they'll get to safety because they know the plan.
So the paramedic told me to apply this to my own life.
Do things like meditation, breathing exercises, practicing self-kindness, etc ESPECIALLY in moments where my life feels "ok" or things feel stable. Because then if there's a fire, I'll know from all the practice, that I can get myself to safety.

So when you stabilize again (and hopefully you will soon!) keep up work and the routine that helps make you confident that if a dip should occur again, you can concur it!

Soooooooo much easier said than done. But like I said, I am trying to apply that to my own existence right now. Trying to remember on "good days" to be grateful and enjoy, yes, but also to do the fire drill.

Keep us posted.

-Dora.