Heart disease...?
Hello, everyone.
I'm new to NMP. I have been an avid reader of these boards for a while, but never joined or posted until last night. I am currently having the hardest time in my life. I am 20 years old, and 35 weeks 2 days pregnant with my first child. I have had a rough pregnancy and can guarantee i will never do It again. Haha. I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder, panic disorder, and OCD when I was 5. So I have been dealing with my issues for 15 years. I have extreme control over my panic attacks most the time now. But It has been a real l struggle to live day to day with this, tho I have managed. My OCD manifests in the form of extreme hypochondria. I am currently on 50mg of Hydroxyzine that I just started taking yesterday per my OB. So there is the basics of me. Here is what im currently dealing with... Heart anxiety (as usual) the last week, I have been going to sleep and when I wake up, my whole body will be shaking, I am dizzy and feel too weak to move. I will struggle to breathe for a brief moment and then catch it finally. These episodes happen everytime I fall asleep, which I would normally contribute to a panic attack. BUT, during these espisodes, if I check my pulse or blood pressure, it will be in the 50s or low 60s and have normal blood pressure. If I am panicking, why would my heart rate be so slow? My normal resting heart rate is in the 70s and 80s, and it gets high with exertion. When these episodes happen, I get so weak it's hard to move. I have been to the ER 3x this week and each time, ekg, ecg, blood work, etc all come back perfect. I was told I have a bad UTI and costochondritis which easily explains my chest wall pain. They did every test in the books. They tested blood, they did ecg, and ekg, they did a chest xray with approval from my OB, and they even checked for DVT's in my legs with an ultrasound. Literally nothing came back other than the UTI. The problem is, they didn't do these tests during an episode. So I dont believe they are accurate. My OB finally said yesterday that he wants me on 50mg of Hydroxyzine 3x a day. That is way too much, as hydroxyzine exhausts me so I only took one yesterday. My anxiety decreased, I was tired, and rested all day. Felt more normal. I have not slept more than 3 hours in a night in the past week, because I am so scared I will die. Finally last night on the meds, I slept 12 hours (amazing feeling) but as soon as i woke this morning, I felt like I was suffocating, I checked my pulse and it was in the low 60s and I could barely even find my pulse cause it was so weak, and i felt too weak to move. I didn't panic, but I knew I was about to breathe my last breath (and look, here I am).. My Dr doesn't think I need to see a cardiologist because he thinks I am just having anxiety. I am so confused and don't understand any of this. When I have these episodes all I can think is that my heart is about to stop. I am struggling to accept the diagnosis that I am truly ok. My heart rate has never been low before. I am so discouraged! All of this has been so bad the last week that I have felt like killing myself. I'm usually not a depressed person. But I don't even feel like myself, I feel like a different person watching myself (derealization) and I don't know what to do anymore. I am completely disconnected. I spend all day googling things trying to be reassured or understand a slow heart rate especially in pregnancy and there is no good info on it. Also, my vision is awful. It feels like everything is in slow motion and I feel dizzy. Its also a little blurry, like if you wear glasses and take them off. I can't handle this anymore. It feels like my chest is empty, and I have barely felt like eating either. :(
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