About to start Citalopram 20mg

[Twirlywoo]

As the title says Doctor have perscribed me citalopram 20mg.
I started with severe anxiety back in 2011 after the birth of my daughter. I went into a terrible place yet managed to recover with self help and meditation. Only now 5yeara later I've hit a all time low. Feeling the worst I have ever felt. I have also experienced dissociation which terrified the life out of me. I couldn't think straight the next at all and took myself to my doctor. He listened and thought now would be the time to take medication and help myself on Road to recovery. For the citalopram he has given me diazepam 2mg x3 daily as needed. As you can imagine from some one who suffers extreme anxiety and OCD like thoughts I'm going out my mind with the fear of taking them and getting all the horrible side effects. I'm practically scared to death.

Please give me some advice. I want to feel better yet I'm that scared I think no it's okay I'll just live with this anxiety and not take them. Then in the next breath the anxiety is so bad I just want to take it but can't being myself to do it 😢

[Mermaid16]

Hi Twirlywoo! Welcome to NMP! You will find lots of friendly supportive people on this site that are willing to share their experiences and help you. We all react differently to meds, so if you can, try to avoid reading the horror stories. It sounds like you have s good doctor, in that he has given you some diazepam to help out with any start up effects. You will never know, if you don't try. I suffered with severe anxiety and although sometimes the start up effects suck, the years of living anxiety free after the initial start up period have definately been worth it. We've all been through the start ups and we're all still here to tell our stories. Good luck. Let me know if you ever need to chat. Tracy xx

[Bike Rider]

I took Cit starting on 20mg and then 40mg, apart from dry mouth, slight weight gain, some initial anxiety at first but that went after a week, I was fine on it.

It did take 8 weeks to fully kick in, so dont be in a rush to see changes these things take time I am afraid.

For my anxiety attacks he gave me a beta blocker, these work but take 1.5 hours to start. I have tried Diazepam for sleep/anxiety but these had no effect at all on me.

Anyway, DON'T be scared of them, they will help but it takes time. I only changed to Fluox because I lost motivation to do things and my GP thinks these will help with that.

[Twirlywoo]

Thank you so much mermaid and Bikeride, I think with anxiety of taking my meds I did the wrong thing by reading all the horror stories.
I just want to feel better and know that this is my last chance to give myself and my children their mother back.
what would be the best time of day to start them?
I work long shifts 3 days a week and also worrying I will be out of it when I have a very important job?

Oh god why do I over think everything ��

[Bike Rider]

Yes, that is one of my issues, overthinking, always have to analyze everything and end up finding the worst answer, but remember, most of these thoughts are only YOUR opinion and probably have no facts to back them up.

I found that Cit 40mg made me tired about 4pm, but, I am a person that has to be occupied or else I am bored and tired. So with you working, you may be ok with this, only time will tell.

I took mine at night so as to help me sleep, ha! no difference at all, so once again trial and test, start in the pm and change to the am if needed, they have a half life of 35 hrs so taking them at a different time won't affect their effect on you.

But it all takes time and your anxiety may get worse at first, so just keep in your mind that they will help you.

As regards the horror stories, most people dont tell you what else they take that could interact with their prescribed meds, they dont tell their GP's either and then wonder why things dont happen. I knew someone who for 12 months was going back and forth to their GP and hospital for tests etc because of side effects, until they finally admitted that they used Ecstasy and Marijuana as well, then everything fell into place and they got sorted out.

[Twirlywoo]

Thanks for the reply again, it really does help to talk to someone.
I think another Of my main fears is the increase in anxiety, when I sit and think it could potentially get worse I'm like 'how'? Could I cope if I felt any worse than I do now?

I can honestly say I don't take no medications that could interact as I find it even hard to take cocodamol. I don't smoke and I don't drink. Only drug I have is coffee and then I've even tried to cut back on that too.

Do/did you ever get that dissociation?
One minute I'm looking around the room listening to noise and stuff then bamb it's like a bang and I snap and think oh yeah I was just like round the room listening to noise? Kind of like the saying "a reality check"?

That's a weird one for me as I never felt it before.

[Bike Rider]

Coffee can make you worse and several people on here will attest to that, so go easy on it.

I enjoy a drink, but know my limitations.

The anxiety may get worse, it did for me, but it only last's a week and knowing that it get easier later on helped me through it.

I dont have dissociation, but I used to get mild "brain zaps" where I would feel dizzy for a split second and these would continue for 5-10 minutes, but during these times and days I felt great, unfortunately I havent had these for 5 weeks now.

[Twirlywoo]

I totally understand that I need to just get a boost into recovery.
I self medicated for 5 whole years and I know I'm strong enough once given a break from this crippling anxiety.

I'm hoping once I get the anxiety and panic attacks under control I can address the issues that have got me into this state.

Thank you so much for taking your time to speak with me.

[Bike Rider]

Talk to me anytime, you can private message me if you wish.

The meds will help with the anxiety, just give them time.

[L-o-n-d-o-n]

citalopram, doesn't do anything apart from lift your mood, and that can take upto 4 weeks to even feel a difference in your self if at all, i was given them didn't help so they gave me escitalopram i was on them for a long time and had problems sleeping and my delusions became worse ( wasn't helping ) so i told the psychologist i was under and she told me thy'er a type of speed (both types) i thought that strange to give something like that to someone with a anxiety disorder but she told me nothing you can do for anxiety only (you can by learning to mentally treat yourself with better thinking, so after that i got myself off them and well i got some dizziness and a headache that lasted for oh about a week or two and i have never took anything else again because they don't work well not for me anyways and i have had a lot of meds, i have found only the ones they give you at hospital work and that is coming from someone who is diagnosed with clinical depression, had more than one trip to the lock up for that from me been 12 years old...with extreme anxiety disorder also agoraphobic, been out the house only three times in 12 years all three was for the doc's...i have crippling ocd, really that is really bad i cannot even watch some tv channels and all they say is (we don't know what to do, what do you think we should do london i laugh