My Worst Fear

[Meg]

KW -

I think the question still remains Whether if the promotion didn't contain any presenting would you want it ?

Is there the option of staying in your current job whilst going through the training and possibly going for the promotion next time round as you improve with confidence and training or don't you want to stay at all ?




Meg

It is impossible to get out of a problem by using the same kind of thinking that it took to get into it.
- Albert Einstein.

[KW]

Hi Meg

The aim of the structure is for me to become Admin Manager and have 2 Admin Assistants under me (i'm the only Admin person at the moment). I'm sure if i explained to my boss that i'm not ready to become manager he'd probably understand and would then employ someone else to become Admin Manager. But there again he might say i've got no choice as i'm the one who has the experience.

I enjoy working where i am, although i do get nervous going to meetings but always manage to get through them. In the ideal world i'd love to go to work and not have to worry about attending meetings or courses.

KW

[Sue]

Hi KW,

From my own experience, if you really think that taking this job will make you ill DONT TAKE IT! I have been there and its not worth it, trust me. I am sure your boss couldnt make you do it against your wishes.

If you are going to get this stressed out, perhaps it would be better to go on with your councilling and concentrate your efforts on your recovery for now. After all, whats more important?

There will always be other opportunities for promotion later on, I am sure.

Take care,

Sue

[KW]

Hi Sue

I had a chat with my family lastnight who are so supportive and we all agreed this promotion just isn't for me. I'd dread going to work and would probably not eat anything from feeling sick, i'd get myself in to such a state. My health is more important and i'm quite happy to just plod along as i am now. Being a manager would be great but it's just not me.

Now i've got the task of explaining to my boss. He's on holiday for the rest of the week now so will ask to see him in private next Monday

KW

[Karen]

Hi KW

It sounds like you have made the right decision for you, and hopefully you feel better for doing so.

It's good your family are so supportive and you were able to discuss it with them so they could help you come to your decision.

I think the most important thing is that it is your decision and if taking the promotion was affecting you so much you were thinking of leaving, I think you've done the right thing for you. Now is obviously not the right time for you to be taking on this extra pressure.

I hope the talk with your boss goes ok on Monday.



Karen



It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.

[Meg]

Hi KW ,

When you talk to your boss to decline the post you could say that you would still be interested in the self development courses but without having the added pressure of 'having' to perform and use the new skills immediately. You might feel comfortable enough to say you would consider covering for the new person when they're recruited and perhaps do a bit of their training on a 1:1 basis as you know so much more about the job. That way you would be gaining experience and practice indirectly .

Well done for making your choice .



Meg

It is impossible to get out of a problem by using the same kind of thinking that it took to get into it.
- Albert Einstein.

[Sue]

Hi KW,

Its tough but given the circumstances, I think you have definately made the right decision.

Megs suggestion sounds like a good idea, what do you think?

Sue

[mypanichelp]

Hi KW,

Its really good that you consulted out here and took the decision which you felt suites best. Looks like you are really an asset to your group and I am sure you will go for that promotion soon.

I myself have been through similar stuff and this is where my anxiety/panic attacks started.

Last year I was under pressure to get promotion. I went through training and all. Then I was able to conduct meetings, give presentations. I used to feel afraid but thought it will go away slowly. I was working hard though I didnt like working on that stuff. On the other side, it was looking like, Boss was preferring another guy over me. It was more pressure than I could handle, no idea how to cope with it.

While explaining something to the other guy (also working for the same promotion), I got so pressured and got my FIRST PANIC ATTACK. And my life is mess ever since.
I ended up changing my job. Now I dont have any meetings.
I have social phobia/anxiety since 1 year and I am not medication since 3 weeks.

Knowing your limits is one of the best thing. That way you can realize how much beyond you are stressing yourself, for what cause, whether you like those things and finally if its worth it.
For me I didnt know my limits. I thought the progress is limitless and I can stretch myself and do anything. Well it was certainly not worth it :-).

I feel really good for you that you consulted the problem before taking the decision.

[KW]

Thank you again for all your support.

I'm interviewing next week for admin (have never interviewed in my life [:I]) and interestingly i'm actually looking forward to it! I'd usually dread someting like this but i've told myself if i'm nervous it's only natural and i've stopped beating myself up about it. I think the counselling is starting to pay off

KW

[Karen]

Hi KW

That's great, actually looking forward to interviewing. You are making such good progress and I'm glad the counselling is helping.

I think you are right about not beating yourself up about getting nervous. Beating myself up about things is something that I still find difficult to stop.

Good luck with the interviews.



Karen



It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.