Anyone over 40 with SA?

[MooCow]

I have social anxiety (not diagnosed but I have the symptoms), and I'm 48. I think I'm older than most people here so I'm wondering if I'm the only one over 40, or even over 30?

It's hard making understanding friends and meeting people who "get" me, and accept me being shy about going out socially.

I've looked at various social anxiety groups I could meet with, but have never found anything I'd be comfortable going to. You'd think the Meetup website would have such groups, but there's nothing local to me.

[Bigboyuk]

I have social anxiety (not diagnosed but I have the symptoms), and I'm 48. I think I'm older than most people here so I'm wondering if I'm the only one over 40, or even over 30?

It's hard making understanding friends and meeting people who "get" me, and accept me being shy about going out socially.

I've looked at various social anxiety groups I could meet with, but have never found anything I'd be comfortable going to. You'd think the Meetup website would have such groups, but there's nothing local to me.

Hi MooCow
So would it be benifical to get a diagnoisis first even though you are sure? No not by a long score it can be any age too! Yes totally hard but on here members do accept each other so np there When you refer to the Meet Up Website are you saying the subforum on here? You can easily look at threads in that section some may be old threads so not so old. So you could get a idea whats what and maybe start you own thread like I have done Good luck Cheers

[MooCow]

Hi MooCow
So would it be benifical to get a diagnoisis first even though you are sure? No not by a long score it can be any age too! Yes totally hard but on here members do accept each other so np there When you refer to the Meet Up Website are you saying the subforum on here? You can easily look at threads in that section some may be old threads so not so old. So you could get a idea whats what and maybe start you own thread like I have done Good luck Cheers

I don't think I need a diagnosis really, as it's not a black and white thing. I don't see it as a medical issue either (like depression can be caused by a chemical imbalance). I simply get anxious in social situations, and I fully understand why, so that's my own diagnosis really. Hope that makes sense!

I meant the meetup.com website. That seems mostly for highly confident people unfortunately. I'll look around more at these forums too. Thanks for the tips.

[Bigboyuk]

I don't think I need a diagnosis really, as it's not a black and white thing. I don't see it as a medical issue either (like depression can be caused by a chemical imbalance). I simply get anxious in social situations, and I fully understand why, so that's my own diagnosis really. Hope that makes sense!

I meant the meetup.com website. That seems mostly for highly confident people unfortunately. I'll look around more at these forums too. Thanks for the tips.

Ahh ok but does it stop you meeting new people? If it does then perhaps counselling wil help or some other therapy would help?
Yes Iam with Meet up too but feel since I have been going to Changes based near to where I live which have social activity's going I am better of going there. Yes and you are welcome

[MooCow]

Ahh ok but does it stop you meeting new people? If it does then perhaps counselling wil help or some other therapy would help?
Yes Iam with Meet up too but feel since I have been going to Changes based near to where I live which have social activity's going I am better of going there. Yes and you are welcome

The anxiety does stop me meeting people, and I've talked about it with my doctor and explained that I don't think counselling is the right path for me. I'm very aware of what's wrong and what to do about it to help. I have confidence deep down you see, but a few issues getting in the way. They are issues I COULD change, but speaking about it to anyone won't make me do it. I need to feel in a happier place and to be accepted by people more first, as then I'll be happier and want to put more into making these changes myself. Getting that emotional support is close to impossible though as nobody understands. I need to know people local to me to really talk properly to and go places with, talk to face to face, etc.. I need company.

[Bigboyuk]

The anxiety does stop me meeting people, and I've talked about it with my doctor and explained that I don't think counselling is the right path for me. I'm very aware of what's wrong and what to do about it to help. I have confidence deep down you see, but a few issues getting in the way. They are issues I COULD change, but speaking about it to anyone won't make me do it. I need to feel in a happier place and to be accepted by people more first, as then I'll be happier and want to put more into making these changes myself. Getting that emotional support is close to impossible though as nobody understands. I need to know people local to me to really talk properly to and go places with, talk to face to face, etc.. I need company.

Well I do and so do others on here so you aren't alone on this and I need company too So suggest start a thread for your area and see if other members in your area want to meet up too Good luck

[Dave1]

A

anyone over 40 with SA?

Yep! I'm working on it, going to some groups for people with mental health issues including Meetup.com ones. Obviously it helps that I'm in London.

[MooCow]

A
Yep! I'm working on it, going to some groups for people with mental health issues including Meetup.com ones. Obviously it helps that I'm in London.

Definitely helps being in London. I'm on the south coast, and there are quite a few other groups near enough for me to get to, but nothing that really fits. I did find a group once for people with SA, but the places they chose to meet at were the worst types of places for anyone who really has SA!

[Bigboyuk]

I'm 47 and socially anxious, though I have found friendship in three separate Meetup groups - one which sees films at the cinema together and chats in the cafe afterwards, one which is a mental health support group, and one which is just a group to try different tearooms and cafes and chat there. I have tried others too with less good results it just so happened these were the three which worked for me.

I haven't so far seen anything on Meet Up that I would go to as yet, but actually fulfilling my needs via a Mental Health Charity which has many different groups and meetings and social gatherings too, and already made friends with a couple of members too so will stick with this and feel really positive since last week and the best I have felt for a long time Cheers

[MooCow]

I'm 47 and socially anxious, though I have found friendship in three separate Meetup groups - one which sees films at the cinema together and chats in the cafe afterwards, one which is a mental health support group, and one which is just a group to try different tearooms and cafes and chat there. I have tried others too with less good results it just so happened these were the three which worked for me.

I keep looking through the meetup groups but there is little that I'd feel comfy with anywhere near me. There is one very local group who do various things, but looking at the list of who goes, they're mostly quite a bit older than me. I still may go to one of their events though (they do a cinema meet and coffee morning in a cafe). I did go on a walk with another group last year, where I met 32 strangers in one go! That was very scary. Most were older than me, and most were also very confident people who weren't very friendly towards me. So I was put off seeing them again.