Mirtazapine Diary For Anyone Who'd Like To Join In

[Panicer]

Hi all

Well the best laid plans and all that. I meant to take my pill earlier last night but got distracted and didn't take it until bed at 22:30, was asleep again at about 23:30 and apart from waking a few times, I managed to sleep through until about 09:00 which was fantastic for me.

My suspected correlation between sleep and anxiety/depression was either proved right again today, or these pills work faster than I thought? Because with the exception of a few moments I've really felt good all day!

Going to really try and take my pill then get to bed early tonight as up at the crack of dawn tomorrow with a long commute to do. I'm normally climbing the walls during this so looking forward to seeing if I'm better this week.

Onwards and Upwards folks, hope you have a great week ahead

Day 4 15mg Mirtazapine

[Domo-kun]

Day 4 on 15mg and had another mixed day. More bad than good, with a very low mood for most of the time. Anxiety still better than when I started though, so not all bad.
Day 5 and still feeling pretty low, so keeping myself busy with work. My vision was a bit blurred for around an hour this morning which was a bit scary. I put it down to succumbing to having a few ciders last night and not sleeping as well as I might. The instructions do say to avoid alcohol, but I never had an issue on fluoxetine.
Anyhow, lesson learned

[Panicer]

Hi all

Good to hear your anxiety was better than it was Domu-kun but sorry to hear your mood was down, I hope it improved as the day went on? I've not had the blurred vision yet thankfully but I've felt quite dizzy at times, what about you? I'm glad it was you that test drove the trying alcohol bit, I'd thought about having a beer this weekend but after your experience I'll think I'll stick to the alcohol free rubbish for now

I got to bed early last night and dropped off within an hour of taking my Mirt. I didn't have the best sleep as I kept waking up but managed to drop off each time again which is new, so quite pleased overall. I had a very anxious drive this morning but managed to hold it together, then a full day of therapy, which was difficult but useful. Depression seems to have lifted a bit but the anxiety seems similar?

Onwards and Upwards

Day 5 15mg Mirtazapine

[Domo-kun]

Hi

Thanks Panicer. Hope you're doing well. I definitely recommend avoiding the alcohol.
Not a great day for me anxiety wise. For comparison though, fluoxetine and sertraline were at least twice as difficult to 'function' with at this early stage. With those, functioning is like trying to act sober in front of your parents. With Mirt, it's more like the resulting hangover - but you're capable of getting on with life if you push yourself.

Sleep wasn't great for me last night either. Suspect that's just a part of adjusting to the effects. I saw somewhere else that when you go up to 30mg, it has the opposite effect on sleep

[Panicer]

Hi All

Well today was a bit of a rubbish one for me. Being stuck in traffic jams first thing this morning for a couple of hours didn't help my fragile stress levels then I managed to have a panic attack during therapy. Mind you if you're going to have a panic attack I guess that's the place to do it I've also been quite dizzy again and have a real headache (which I rarely get) this afternoon?

Domo-kun I read the same thing about Mirt at 30mg being more likely to keep you awake? I didn't have a great sleep again last night so really hoping it wasn't just a three day thing as I was enjoying getting some shut eye. I'm having some very vivid dreams though! What about you?

Oh and I love the analogy of life on fluoxetine being like trying to act sober in front of your parents

Day 6 15mg Mirtazapine

[Panicer]

Hi all

Today was a toughie again. Don't know if it's my body getting used to the Mirtazapine, coming off Fluoxetine, a cold or a combination of all three but I felt decidedly rough today. Headache, cotton wool filled head and dizziness. Didn't sleep very well either so that may well have contributed? On the plus side (I always try to find one now) my anxiety wasn't too bad, oh and today is one week in to my Mirt journey Onwards and Upwards

Day 7 15mg Mirtazapine

[Domo-kun]

Hi

Day 7 - 15mg.

Kept myself busy today, which really helped to keep the side effects under control. Didn't really notice much anxiety and didn't stop long enough to have many negative thoughts. Maybe I'm just getting used to feeling this way rather than getting used to the Mirt. Who knows?
I did have a pretty bad headache this afternoon - and I don't usually get headaches, so almost certainly a side effect.

Keep calm and carry on taking Mirt. - as no-one ever says

[Panicer]

Hi all

Well today was interesting again. Can only describe the first few hours as seeing the world through someone elses eyes? Very bizarre and a bit scary to be honest. But I stuck with Domu-kun's "keep calm and keep taking the Mirt" theory and it finally cleared up after about four hours and I feel pretty good this afternoon with fairly low levels of anxiety.

Also had a very dry mouth again all day, so can't wait to see what side effect joys await me tomorrow. if I wake up thinking I am someone else not just borrowing their eyes for a bit I'm giving up

Day 8 15mg Mirtazapine

[Domo-kun]

Day 8 on 15mg

I know the 'world through someone else's eyes' feeling very well! For me it's like what I see and what I feel are slightly disconnected and I can only pay attention to one at a time. Luckily I've not had that since being on Mirt.

Really mixed day for me. Slept ok, felt like all the side effects had gone, and I actually felt calm but energised as I made my way to work. Even as I arrived at work, I felt surprisingly ok and made a mental plan for what I needed to get done.
I got to my desk, had a casual conversation with a colleague and started cracking on with work.
A few minutes later and I'm having a conversation with another colleague. Just a general work related chat, but then a switch flipped in my brain and the anxiety took hold. The whole 'am i making sense?' filter kicked in and I'm doubting every word I think or that comes out of my mouth. I manage to get through the conversation without appearing odd and decide to go and get a drink. I get up and my walk has gone to manual, like I'm having to perform every step with ultimate precision or I'll go down like a sack of you know what.
From then on, it's been pretty much anxiety all the way, with a few breaks where I've managed to focus on something long enough to push the anxiety to the back of my mind.
I think a night on the couch with some rubbish tv ought to get me through until bed time.
Having been through this before, I know this is all just part of the process. It's just sometimes difficult to convince yourself of that whilst mid-panic.

[Panicer]

Hi Domu-Kun

Bloody well done on getting through all that while at work, I really don't think I would have managed it! You should be really proud of yourself!

I'd say you deserve a beer tonight to accompany your rubbish TV but based on what happened the last time maybe just an alcohol free one.