Constant feeling of anxiety

[ChildOfTheKing]

Thank you I think I get impatient with the healing process. Having a bit of an upset stomach this morning but I've been able to keep things down, so far at least. It comes and goes in the last few days. I feel very tense in the stomach and chest area which makes it difficult to relax and breathe easy.

[ChildOfTheKing]

Well today started off awful. Right when I woke up my mom was yelling at me about how I need to get over this, that I'm being a coward, dragging this out too long, I'm lazy, selfish, and not even bringing in any income anymore, and I'm ruining the family. Why can't I just snap out of this? I didn't ask for this, these last 3 months have been hell. I'm trying to find another job even though I don't even know how well I'd function right now. And I'm trying so hard to not feel my anxiety symptoms all the time and I wish there was an off button.

[beatroon]

I'm really sorry to hear about this. No wonder you are feeling bad, with your mother taking such an unhelpful attitude.

You certainly aren't being a coward. Having anxiety is a very scary thing indeed and you are not just surviving it, you are taking active steps to manage it, and doing the best you can. It takes enormous strength of character to face up to the beast in the way you have, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Likewise, you are not lazy or selfish, and I highly doubt you are ruining the family - that sounds like an exaggeration from a stressed-out person.

Is it possible that your mum is worrying about you and doing so unproductively, and perhaps responding to stresses in her own life? You mentioned that you have had some bad life events recently. It sounds as though she is not helping you at the moment, but perhaps this has more to do with how she's feeling. I'm sure she loves you a lot and just wants all this to go away as much as you do.

Would it help to show her some resources about anxiety? Maybe there's a web page you could look at together. Or perhaps she could come with you to a counsellor or doctor's appointment, so they can help her understand what you are going through. You mentioned you have a sister - perhaps they could talk things through together if she is more sympathetic.

[ChildOfTheKing]

I know she means well and she loves me. She does care and things have calmed down but it was definitely unhelpful. it was very overwhelming and I finally tried one of the new meds my Dr prescribed. So let's see how that goes.

I'm going to try to show her some resources later but right now just going to step out and try to forget all this even happened. The problem is she thinks anxiety disorder is something you can snap out of. Example: "I felt anxiety when you were in the hospital but I got over it when you were OK." "There's nothing to feel anxious about." "Everyone gets anxiety and then they get over it."

She did come to my counseling appointment the first one, but she thinks that it doesn't have to be a process.

My sister has depression and thus is a bit more sympathetic even tho she herself has said she doesn't quite understand it all which I wouldn't want her to or expect her to.

[ChildOfTheKing]

Thanks to all, yes it is difficult and you can't just switch it off. I wish I could! I did have a bit of a talk with my mom yesterday, she still doesn't quite understand but maybe she understands a bit more.

The medication made me really dizzy and more anxious, still feeling it today. I did still go out and go to the gym yesterday, going again today.