Obsessive thoughts - How to deal with them?

[up a ladder]

I am very much aware that my mood is severely affected by my thoughts.
Problem is that it happens so fast that I am not really aware of what the thoughts are. I know they follow the classic pattern or not being worthy, comparing myself to others, discounting etc.
I have to really try to force these thoughts aside and try to confirm they are only thoughts and not true, but everything I read suggests not fighting them, just let them flow.
Been sitting in an office all day where most of the time I am gritting my teeth with a few oasis moments of feeling okay.

[Bill]

Try thinking of the thoughts in this way. A bully will keep verbally bullying when they know they can keep annoying and upsetting you. The bully's goal is to keep you as tense as possible because the bully can feed off the distress they're causing you. The more stressed you feel, the more the bully will be attracted back to feed so the more you keep trying to push these thoughts aside, the more the bully will keep bringing them back because it knows they bother you.

The idea of allowing the thoughts through you is to cut off the feed to your bully. The bully then knows it can't bother you so in the end it gives up and you then stay more relaxed because you're no longer constantly tense worrying when your bully will next attack you.

It's a bit like someone being afraid of dogs. They will try to avoid them as much as possible so when they reach a street corner they'll be afraid there's one waiting for them. They end up constantly tense fearing a dog will appear at any time anywhere just as you fear these thoughts constantly worrying you.

It's all about fear. A fear of dogs or a fear of intrusive thoughts. In both examples you have to learn to not tense up at the sight or thought of them by letting them flow through just as you do with any other thought that doesn't worry you. For instance you won't tense up at the thought of a cream cake. You have to learn to treat all thoughts as if they're all as harmless as cream cakes and then the bully will move on.

Also if you see a lion, you won't be aware of yourself actually thinking anything. You'll instinctively want to run because you know the sight of a lion is something to be afraid of. Your thoughts that worry you are your lion so every time you think them you're instinctively wanting to push them away because they worry you. However, just like a thought of a lion, they are only thoughts. If you could look at yourself, you wouldn't even see them because they only exist in your mind. They are nothing to be afraid of because they are just symptoms of a stressed mind trapped in an office.

One last thing - if you're aware of gritting your teeth, you'll also be aware you're tensed up because gritting is a symptom of tension. Therefore, try to learn tips on how to keep cool under pressure because when you're calm, your bully can't worry you because you're more able to ignore it because your bully feeds off stress.

Hope that makes some sense.