Exchange student panic attacks and anxiety

[buraku]

I'm sorry if this is not in a right category but I really need to share this with someone.

This is my first time in exchange, more speficically in Japan. I'm from the other side of the globe and I've always loved Japan and it's culture. However, it's now my first day here, and I have never felt this bad in my life. I've a history of anxiety, depression and very rare panic attacks, and I also have mediciation for it. Now it feels like it's constant panic attack all the time. I might chill out for 10 minutes, and then a new wave comes. My eyes are already red from crying, and I got to sleep two hours when I woke up and had a another attack, heart racing, feeling losing control. At least nowadays I know that they are panic attacks and know I can't actually die. I think the worst thing is when I think about my boyfriend and the distance I'm from home without anyone really close to me near-by.

I've been talking to my friends on facebook and calling my boyfriend, even informed my professor (visiting lecturer from the same country as I'm from) and he promised to ask around where I could get help.

How am I supposed to get through the night and the feeling that I just want the hell out of here?? And what kind of loser am I if I end up leaving home early? (the exchange would be 4 months).

[Annie0904]

You are bound to be anxious on your first day. It is a very different culture and will take time to get used to. I had students from Japan stay with me for a year on exchange and it was difficult for them to adjust to life here at first but after the initial 'culture shock' and jet lag they soon settled and I am sure you will too. 4 months isn't a long time and it will soon go.
Give yourself a week or 2 to adjust then see how you feel. Think of the positive things you will experience and try to fill your time with fun things.

---------- Post added at 16:42 ---------- Previous post was at 16:40 ----------

oh and if you are not happy after a while and don't stay then you are not a loser...at least you tried.