After the sun sets

[Citydeer]

I don't understand why I find evenings so hard. I felt so good all day today, just like completely anxiety free person. But there's something about darkness that seems to set me off most nights. The panic creeps in. The world seems like a very cold place, and the nature of life seems very dark and all there is ahead of me is doom.

Tomorrow morning I'll wake up feeling okay again and I'll look forward to going for a walk outside, I'll sit in a cafe by the window with natural light spilling in, with my laptop and I'll apply for jobs. People will walk in and out with their takeaway cups, they will sit and have business meetings, gossip, or sit behind their laptops like I do. I'll feel part of the world.

I used to look forward to nights more than anything else when I worked full time, as it was my only free time. Now that I'm unemployed I just dread them and the endless amount of dark that seems to be present.

Sorry for the rant, just needed to put it out somewhere.


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[jamiebythesea]

I think a lot of people feel this way. Most illnesses feel worse at night, not sure why,but I definitely find evenings worse for my anxiety. At least with the summer coming the nights will stay brighter for longer. I was thinking about getting someone to paint a bright sunshine scene mural in my living room. (I seriously have considered this).

[Citydeer]

I think a lot of people feel this way. Most illnesses feel worse at night, not sure why,but I definitely find evenings worse for my anxiety. At least with the summer coming the nights will stay brighter for longer. I was thinking about getting someone to paint a bright sunshine scene mural in my living room. (I seriously have considered this).

Yes that's true even when I have something as small as a headcold, it's always worse at night!! Very true, I love summer for that reason. That's such a lovely idea about the mural in your room!!!! I bet that would brighten it up



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[florida94]

I know what you're feeling. I have it too. I live nearby Disney World and visit whenever I can. There are times I'll be there and be all happy, but then I go home that every night just not feeling 100% and I feel like theres something missing inside of me. And I think its really just because of the fact that like random issues and thoughts enter my mind.

to fix this, I usually try to find reasons to find joy in my day. I'll look back on my day and see all the good things that happened. Or I'll just try to fall asleep and somewhat feel good in bed to release negative energy and to finally start the new day. It's scary cuz I know exactly what you're feeling. Just know you're not the only one feeling this way