Obsessive online friend

[Bigboyuk]

When I felt so desperate to talk at age 9-11, I used to call my then friend every single day after school like a robot, which looking back, must have been a major situation on her side. But no one on her end ever told me to call less frequently. Another friends dad finally snapped at me to stop calling when I called approx. 5 times to check she'd come home. I kinda got it then!

I can understand that desperation for a friend that she has from my child perspective. She literally feels like she has no one. She is a grown woman though. But she absolutely needs to be told how to behave appropriately. Blocking would work very well, but like most relationships in life, it may have been able to have been sorted through simple, honest and direct conversation.

Yes can relate to that too sadly. Sure she needs to be told but in a way that is not hurtful or nasty. Unfortunately my friend on here didn't give me that chance I was blocked and boy did it hurt so the situation needs to be handled delicately, Then if that doesn't work then only block as a last resort Cheers

[Bee84]

Yes if she leaves it too long she'll end up snapping. If told kindly but firm and with tact, they can probably still be friends.

[Bigboyuk]

Yes if she leaves it too long she'll end up snapping. If told kindly but firm and with tact, they can probably still be friends.

One would hope so Cheers

[BigBoiBenzo]

i've had so many internet friends... most of them turned out to be crazy

just being honest

[au Lait]

That's a tough one. I understand that you don't want to hurt her feelings, but at the same time you have to take care of yourself and your own needs. If someone is pushing for too much of your time, then it is perfectly within your rights to set boundaries. If she is a true friend, she will respect that.

Or if you decide that you don't want to be her friend anymore, that's ok too. You are not obligated to spend time with anyone that you don't want to. Friendships change over time and people drift apart.

You can set boundaries by limiting the amount of time that you spend interacting with her. You don't have to respond to her messages right away. If she continues to message you after not getting a quick response, that doesn't mean that you need to give in to her demand for more of your time. You can continue to wait and reply when you feel ready. By giving in and messaging her right as she demands you to, you are teaching her that's a valid way to get the response that she wants from you. By waiting she will learn that you are not available to her 24/7.

She will either accept this new way of interacting, and the boundaries you are setting, or she will not. If she doesn't, and she continues to push you for responses or questions you about your lack of constant attention, then it's time to have a heart to heart with her. At that point you can just be honest and say that you need a bit of space.

If she still won't accept your boundaries after all of this, then I'd say she has shown that she isn't a true friend, and perhaps it's time to cut ties.