Oh such a dark dark place.

[saf138]

Hi all

So I just wanted to post what happened to me exactly a year ago today and yes even to the hour mark I know how sad but it all started in the shower after finding a lump I just "knew" I had TC I mean Google said I did so who am I to argue? and things rapidly started going downhill from there I quickly started developing real symptoms such as:

T.C (ultrasound referral)
Melanoma of the left thumb nail (large brown band running down the nail)
Colon cancer (emergency oncologist referral)
Brain tumor (went for eye examination )
M.S
Enlarged lymph nodes (groin,neck,back of head)
Eye cancer (brown spot on the white part and flickering eye lid)
Mouth cancer (hard lump on hard palate)
Throat cancer (blood in saliva for 2-3 months in the mornings)
Bladder cancer (constant urination and pain in that region)
stomach cancer
Spine cancer (even though I have had back pains for a decade I knew all of a sudden it become sinister)

How could I not have all that I had the exact symptoms Google was mentioning? Who cared what my Gp said this is Google I must have made 20 visits to my gp in a span of 3 months (much respect to you sir)

But did i really have those symptoms? I did lose 12-13 pounds of weight in 4 weeks along with constant abdomen pain so I must have stomach cancer right? NOPE just stress and anxiety well what about the constant migraines all day everyday for a month I must have a brain tumor right? NOPE just tight muscles in the neck and traps from poor posture okay okay what about the night sweats every night for a week and lack of appetite huh Definately lymphoma right? NOPE just stress and anxiety.
Well I was waking up every morning in the winter spitting out thick blood surely throat cancer NOPE just irritated sinuses caused by seasonal allergies.
Okay fine I dont have all those illnesses............. Apart from M.S I constantly had the shakes, dizziness, weak limbs and the sensation I was on a rocking boat M.S right? NO just anxiety and stress.

I can honestly say from the bottom of my heart the past year was the worst of my life and the funny thing is I'm still here and nothing came out off anything I truly feel for you guys and gals who are going through the same thing but more than that I truly feel for those who are going through real symptoms and illnesses which we all need to put forth our thoughts and prayers may peace and blessing be upon you all.

Once you deal with your anxiety I promise you you will feel alive again.

Peace.

[Fishmanpa]

Once you deal with your anxiety I promise you you will feel alive again.

Excellent post! Congrats on learning how to tame the dragon!

Positive thoughts

[saf138]

Excellent post! Congrats on learning how to tame the dragon!

Positive thoughts

Thank you very much Fishmanpa I can honestly say that yourself helped me along the way with your helpful replies on a few of my other posts much respect to you sir.

[ServerError]

I've felt happier and more alive since recovering from a bout of anxiety than I ever did before it. It's a place that any of us can get to, no matter how much we've suffered or how long.

[saf138]

Absolutely and I'm happy that you dont have to deal with the anxiety anymore I just think the hardest part was accepting it all to be nothing more than just anxiety once that was done and a little patience you automatically start to feel much better.

[HopelessWorrier2011]

Fabulous post! Respect to you sir! X

[saf138]

Fabulous post! Respect to you sir! X

Thank you very much

[Grumpy]

Great post.

[Grumpy]

Great post.