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Thread: So scared

  1. #21
    Join Date
    May 2010
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    73

    Re: So scared

    Exactly! Although she hadn't annoyed me at the time!
    Thinking back, she was snoring a few weeks go and I had the thought, like most partners properly doing fleetingly, "shut up or I'll kill you" - and thought nothing more of it.
    But now I'm obsessed with that thought from Friday.
    Is the adrenaline normal?

  2. #22

    Re: So scared

    Quote Originally Posted by CantonaKing View Post
    Exactly! Although she hadn't annoyed me at the time!
    Thinking back, she was snoring a few weeks go and I had the thought, like most partners properly doing fleetingly, "shut up or I'll kill you" - and thought nothing more of it.
    But now I'm obsessed with that thought from Friday.
    Is the adrenaline normal?
    See? the thought of your wive snoring you shrugged off, but your anxiety sadly just latched on this time, so at least you know it can be stopped. And the adrenaline is your anxiety, higher it is the more paniced you are (head going round and round) you just need to find ways to control it.

  3. #23
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    May 2010
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    73

    Re: So scared

    True - but because I have generalised anxiety disorder, it can be difficult to control and think about nothing else, even though I've tried to distract myself.

  4. #24

    Re: So scared

    Quote Originally Posted by CantonaKing View Post
    True - but because I have generalised anxiety disorder, it can be difficult to control and think about nothing else, even though I've tried to distract myself.

    It CAN get better though, im going through a rough patch myself but with the right help etc, you will learn how to deal with it.

  5. #25
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    May 2010
    Posts
    73

    Re: So scared

    Sorry to say "but" constantly, but I'm not seeing therapist for another 10 days.
    We were just cooking together earlier, my wife and I, with knives and everything, and i didn't get any bad thoughts, thankfully.
    But I can tell she is off with me cos my anxiety has been awful all weekend - which, in turn, makes me think she deserved the bad thoughts I'm thinking about her!
    Or maybe I'm over-analysing everything?

  6. #26
    Join Date
    May 2017
    Posts
    89

    Re: So scared

    CantonaKing, have you read any decent self help books or anything that will give you an understanding of how your anxiety works?

    Your fear of your anxiety symptoms is making you feel worse. When you understand how this condition works, you will lose the fear and start feeling better. Does that make sense?

    For some people just reading and understanding that their frightening symptoms are completely normal and harmless will help them instantly. I know that it did for me.

  7. #27
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    May 2010
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    73

    Re: So scared

    Thanks.
    Yeah, I've been reading lots online over the weekend while feeling like this - I did feel better, but then started panicking again.
    Like why is it only my wife I had this intrusive thought about, etc, and the the internal chatter - which I've read about and know is completely normal - which tells me she deserves it cos she is being off with me...

  8. #28

    Re: So scared

    Quote Originally Posted by CantonaKing View Post
    Thanks.
    Yeah, I've been reading lots online over the weekend while feeling like this - I did feel better, but then started panicking again.
    Like why is it only my wife I had this intrusive thought about, etc, and the the internal chatter - which I've read about and know is completely normal - which tells me she deserves it cos she is being off with me...


    It might be just your wife because she is what the thought originally involved, i dont know but either way its just thoughts as you know.

  9. #29
    Join Date
    May 2017
    Posts
    89

    Re: So scared

    Because of your fear. You fear something bad happening to your wife because you care about her. You wouldn't have any fearful thoughts about something you don't care about or if you did, they wouldn't have the impact on you that these thoughts do, you probably wouldn't even register having them.

    Have you tried Self Help for your Nerves by Claire Weekes or David Burns Feeling Good (which is more about depression, but has useful CBT exercises and other good things)?

    Everybody's different of course, but they really helped me. Other people might recommend something else, you just have to try a few and see if something appeals to you.

    I bought At Last a Life from all the great reviews and it was the most unhelpful pile of garbage I've ever read. I was enraged by how bad it was. Most people on Amazon seem to love it....

    Btw, your other posts suggest your wife is being a bit unsympathetic about your illness. You probably have some resentment about this. She really needs to try and understand how it works too.

  10. #30
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Posts
    73

    Re: So scared

    Thank you. I think she does, she just finds its frustrating that my anxiety has been frequent lately.
    So, internal chatter is completely normal?

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