scared meds did more harm than good please help me

[panic_down_under]

I TOOK IT.

I did it.... I hope this is the first step in my recovery

Good for you! As someone once said, a journey of a thousand miles begins with one step. You've just begun yours.

[Chrysmar09]

Im so scared of the meds causing permanent damage. I am scared of it making my intrusive thoughts worse which will trigger my schizophrenia scare... the paxil experience really traumatized me.

[MyNameIsTerry]

Well done in making a start.

If the intrusive thoughts are initially worse remember that still doesn't mean your fear is coming true, it's just how these meds tend to increase our anxiety levels for a time before they start working.

[Chrysmar09]

Im on day two and I think im anxious. I thought on such a low dose it would be ok.... but now im wondering if I am doing the right thing. Been wondering if im experiencing depersonalization or slipping into psychosis(is that possible).... Im thinking its my anxiety just being high... im going to take a klonopin and hope it helps

[panic_down_under]

Im on day two and I think im anxious. I thought on such a low dose it would be ok....

A low dose will significantly reduce the intensity, but some increase in anxiety may still occur. It's caused by the initial increase in serotonin activity, but after a few weeks the brain responds by decreasing serotonin synthesis and expression and it eases. That's the way it is supposed to work.

but now im wondering if I am doing the right thing.

Taking meds will probably make your life significantly better within a couple of months, doing nothing is unlikely to. Try and focus on the goal, not the now.

Been wondering if im experiencing depersonalization or slipping into psychosis(is that possible).... Im thinking its my anxiety just being high..

You're allowing your mind to over think this. Whenever this starts to happen go and do something else which occupies it for a while.

im going to take a klonopin and hope it helps

A good idea.

[Chrysmar09]

Im not going to quit I just dont like the thoughts that are making me feel paranoid and questioning everything.... I wish I could fight this without meds

[MyNameIsTerry]

Remember what we've all be saying though, you wouldn't know if you were in psychosis as that's the point really that it is so powerful you can't apply rational thinking inside that situation about it.

I think your anxiety is quite strong at the moment so anything can make you feel worse. It's just a matter of trying to tolerate it and push through.

[AntsyVee]

Hey, at least we live in a time where we have meds to fight this! Can you imagine not having any relief?

[panic_down_under]

Im not going to quit I just dont like the thoughts that are making me feel paranoid and questioning everything....

As Terry has posted, when in its grip the paranoid usually aren't aware they are paranoid, so if you believe you are then you're almost certainly not. OTOH, catastrophizing, expecting the very worst about everything, is very common when very anxious.

I wish I could fight this without meds

Is therapy an option? The cognitive, behavioural (CBT, REBT, etc) and mindfulness therapies can be at least as effective as meds.

[Chrysmar09]

I just left therapy and he explained psychosis to me....and explained my anxiety can make me have these thoughts too and we are working on mindfulness and deep breathing too...and being in the NOW moment... and yes thank god we are in a time where i can get some relief