i dont think i can handle it

[blackie]

Hiya
Got all in a panic this morning. My gran and aunt want to come down for lunch and i was going to put them off but i thought no i can do this. So i have got everything ready but my auint has just rung and wants to bring my cousin. I dont know if i can handle it. Shes a lovly little girl but is quite demarnding as shes desabled. I dont know if my neaves can stand it. I dont know what to do.
Please help
Blackie

[Jaco45er]

Hi Blackie

I get like that with visitors. There was a time when I couldn't stand people coming to visit, and that included family,

I am not too sure exactly why, but I think its the thought of having to bluff your way through, looking interested, making converstation when really, all you want is for them to leave.

The thing is though, if you do make an excuse for them not to come round, you could be struck with the feeling that you "lost to it" again, and, it will open the door to avoidance. Avoidance is something that is key to avoid (excuse the pun) as this is the ball and chain that can keep you ill.

Do you take anything for your meds to calm you?

Does your family know you are not too well at the moment?

I used to have like a mental toobox for these situations. If I really didn't want visitors, but couldn't get out of it, when they arrived, I would tell them I wasn't too well and sorry if I appear not to be with it 100%. This took the pressure off having to by fully "on the ball" and visitors didn't overstay their welcome.


I really do know how you feel, and I know its an awful feeling, but the only positive is going through these situations now, will make you stronger in the future.

Good luck, sorry I can't wave a magic wand sadly, but let us know how you get on.

TC

Jaco

[blackie]

Hiya
Thanks Jaco. Good pun.lol.
Its just at the moment my parents are away on holiday for 2 weeks so i have been completly on my own. And thats been hard enough to cope with but i have and quite well i think. I had my aunt and grama come down last week and i cooked them a nice roast and they had a great time. But today i really just cant handle it. My family do know im not well and understand it so thats good. I have spoke to my aunt and they are not going to come down. I know i should not have avoided it and faced up to it but i dont feel that guilty. I am tring to do an awful lot at the moment including taking my degree.And being agorophobic makes it pretty hard to see people so maybe i am just out of practise. I have always needed a place to get away too when i want to be on my own. I have been like that since i was a kid.
Ok now im waffling.
thanks again
Blackie

[Jaco45er]

Ahh well you done a roast already, so you know you can do it no problem, just put today down as a bad day, nothing more.

Good luck with the degree, if its do one get one free this month, I will buy the other degree off you (hey, what's wrong with short cuts?).

TC

Jaco

[blackie]

Lol, still got 3 more years work to get the degree sadly.Still it gives me something to destact my mind with, and another 3 years to get myself well.
Take care
Blackie

[blackie]

Hiya
My gran and aunt did come down and we had a good time.
They even bought me a bar of chocolate.yum yum,
Blackie

[Jaco45er]

Nice one


See, another result for wee blackie, stronger than you think young lady.

They didn't leave a bottle of wine for me did they?

well done

Jaco

[blackie]

Funny you should mention that, i have just cracked open a bottle. care for a vertial glass.hehe

Thanks for you support today
Blackie

[MissChampers]

I hate having visitors because I can't be myself and I just can't be bothered will small talk. I know it sounds awful but my family come round every single weekend, sometimes on both Saturday & Sunday, and I can't relax or get anything done knowing somebody will turn up any moment. If it isn't the phone ringing every 5 minutes then it's someone knocking at the door and sometimes I feel like my house isn't my own. I've even thought of moving just to get away from everyone so I can be left in peace.

[blackie]

Hiya miss champers

Sorry to hear you feel that way. Cant you tell yor family in a nice way not to come so often? I am fine once the people arrive as long as i can get away if i need to.
Take care
Blackie