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Thread: HOCD/ROCD feels real help me

  1. #11

    Re: HOCD/ROCD feels real help me

    Hope you feel better. I relate to the rOCD stuff MAJORLY. Know that you are not alone. I have felt alone and reading this forum has helped me.

  2. #12

    Re: HOCD/ROCD feels real help me

    You shouldn't read them as exposure, they help a few people, but it seems for you this is not the best exposure.
    Don't check!Stop thinking! Sit down, start breathing, close your eyes and only pay attention to your breathing.Let the thoughts flow, examine them, but let them flow.And then bring back your attention to your breathing again.Do this a few times until you calm down.
    Don't try to disprove your ocd, you can't. Repeat the thoughts, agree with them, it will be hell, but you will feel better after a shorter or longer amount of time. Listen, other people's coming out doesn't mean you are gay. I know bi and lesbian people, and I'm even good friends with them, but that doesn't mean that I'm bi or else too. You never wanted a relationship with them, you would have known if you were gay, no, there is NO hidden self that waited to be discovered.
    Feel free to email me.Stay strong.

  3. #13

    Re: HOCD/ROCD feels real help me

    But what if my past childhood experiences mean that I am? My whole love life and relationship is a lie???!

    That's what my thoughts are telling me. I don't look at woman and want to have sex with them tho! But what if?

    Why is my head latching onto these memories/experiences. I feel awful.

  4. #14

    Re: HOCD/ROCD feels real help me

    I suggest taking a look at her blog, she has an interview there with a fellow sufferer, spike warning tho. You've never wanted it, I had the exact same feelings and thoughts when my HOCD was strong.
    https://jackieleasommers.com/tag/hocd/

  5. #15

    Re: HOCD/ROCD feels real help me

    Is this reassurance?
    Is it normal to seek reassurance that you have OCD and are therefore not gay?

  6. #16

    Re: HOCD/ROCD feels real help me

    You seek reassurance about is seeking reassurance normal in ocd. This is a main feature of OCD. You seek reassurance from us, You can't be gay. Listen, it feels really really real, sometimes it still makes me believe that I like a bi friend of mine, at that moment I can't even tell if I'm stressed about it,god, I even get the feeling of liking the thought, but I know I don't, when I hvae my clear moments I can tell, but when I don't I just can't, only when I calm down, so I think You get what I say, it's hard, it seems real, but it's OCD.

  7. #17

    Re: HOCD/ROCD feels real help me

    Please can someone help me?? This has come back and it’s worse than ever! Is it real? Is it true? I feel shame and guilt for what I did when I was younger and now I’m scared this means I’m in denial/internalised homophobic.

    I don’t want this (but what if I do) I can’t stop thinking about it and searching my feelings. My poor fiancé knows everything. I don’t want to hurt him or leave him (but what if I do)
    I don’t fancy women or have crushes (but what if I secretly do) the opposite sex attraction I had and crushes on male celebs I had had gone. I feel distant from my fiancé. This is all I can think about. I need to know. We are getting married next year. What if I ruin our big day and find out I’m actually a lesbian??

    I don’t want this. I don’t want to be this. (I do have gay and lesbian friends. I don’t hate them btw) what if I’m not completely straight? Do arousing dreams mean something? All my fantasies are men tho.

  8. #18
    Join Date
    Nov 2018
    Posts
    7,747

    Re: HOCD/ROCD feels real help me

    I know this probably won't help, but... bisexuality is very much a thing. You can love your man (like I love mine) and still enjoy crushes on women (like I do on Cate Blanchett, and Siobhan MacSweeney, and plenty of others).

    Human sexuality is incredibly complicated, but that's half the fun.

  9. #19

    Re: HOCD/ROCD feels real help me

    I know. But one of my fandom friends who was bi has just come out as lesbian. I’m glad for her. She used to have crush also on the same Male celeb as me. I feel awful that it triggered me.

  10. #20

    Re: HOCD/ROCD feels real help me

    Please please could someone help me out with this?

    This worry is not going away and now I’m concerned what if I’m more aroused by women than men?? I’ve had a few arousing same-sex dreams in the past. Strong arousal not like when I’ve had opposite sex dreams. Does that mean something?

    I’ve always had a great sex life with my fiancé until recently now I feel numb. I’ve never had same-sex Fantasies Or crushes but what if this is suppression?

    I’ve only crushed on men in a sexual way.
    A few female friends but just in friendship. I can’t let this go? What if I’m living a lie?

    This is all because I experimented with my same-sex cousin when I was a teen. I’m so ashamed. What if that means something? She was my best friend growing up. What if I loved her more than that?? I feel sick. I love my fiancé I don’t want to hurt him. How can I get married now???

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