Severe Health Anxiety After Cancer, Here. Hi!
Hello all, I'm relieved I was allowed to join, though today I'm not nearly as panicked as I was yesterday when I first tried to.
I'm here because I just came out of a year long cervical cancer scare. I think there are many women who, after being told they've hand an abnormal test come back, are initially frightened and wondering what will be discovered. Perhaps there's some dysplasia or maybe an early stage cancer. They get a fairly minor surgery to have it removed and go on with their lives. I would've LOVED for this to have happened to me!
What happened instead was that I was sent in for the more invasive surgery, which was traumatic in and of itself - only to find out after the initial 3 month waiting period, that the doctor hadn't gotten everything! So on to the next procedure, which was much more minor - but it was too late by then. All I could think was, "If it wasn't gotten the first time, who's to say it will all have been gotten this time?...or next time?...or EVER?"....thus began my war with health anxiety. I got my second surgery done last March. I tried to go on with my life...again...for another 3 month wait..but of course became petrified by the time June rolled around. Turns out I was clear, but now I'll be going back for my next 3 month check next week, and I'm petrified even more than I was before June's check up...not entirely sure why.
In the meantime, I became paranoid about a scabbed over bug bite I insisted MUST be cancerous - It was a wart. Still got it, too. Most recently I started to get ringing in my ear. Well naturally this must be throat or tonsil cancer, right?...I went to an ENT after a month of hoping it would go away. I was told I had a nasal polyp. Oh....is that all? Good thing Dr. Google was by my side to tell me that they're benign, and all would be well...except for the part about how it was only in ONE nostril, which is rare, and could indicate....you guessed it...the "C" word. I went into a full blown panic attack over that one after being at least mildly worried about it over the last 3 weeks since my initial treatment. I did go to a different doctor to get a second opinion today, and he got me a CT scan and all the rest, only to reassure me that it indeed WAS just a nasal polyp - even if it IS on only one side of my nasal cavity - and not to worry about it and go away. XD
So I'm left to wonder....what will be next? What will happen next week when I get my second 3 month check for the cervical stuff? How many more upcoming checks will I start going into anxiety attacks over, assuming the worst will happen, until I can finally just calm down and go back to living life?....I don't know...it's why I'm here.
Thanks for reading! I hope to find a supportive community here, and I'll do my best to contribute to the support as best I can!
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