Smear tomorrow, always sends my HA through the roof

[LF87]

Hi,
I have my smear test booked for tomorrow. I have yearly ones as I've had mild changes for the last two years so they just monitor it. But, I can't stay rational and see it as a monitoring and helpful process. Instead I feel dread, withdrawn and totally freaked out. I've stayed off university twice this week already, and I know if the results are abnormal again I will be so upset.

Has anyone had similar experience with anything like this who can help me stay rational? I appreciate this is a womans thing but for me it is the catalyst for major HA relapse two years running. It's like I know what's in store for me and it's really getting me down.

I'm terrified the changes will be worse. My friends keep telling me not to get too frightened as 4 of them have had the same thing and had worse changes plus treatment. But I am just obsessed by it all.

Any advice really appreciatedx

[Leslie735]

My friend had an abnormal smear test early last year in 2016. She had a repeat done about 6 or 7 months later and it ended up coming back normal.

[Murdock]

I had mild changes back in 2013 but HPV negative. Did they test you for HPV? They had me on yearly ones too but by 2014 it was normal and has been ever since (They kept giving me yearly ones because of a system error, and I’m back on the normal 3 year wait now). I know it can be scary but the fact you get seen every year is a good thing. Remember this is a test to prevent the worst. Three years are thought to be sufficient because of the time it takes for cellular changes to occur (on average it’s at least 10 years from exposure to the big C and that’s in the pretty rare instance that a person’s body doesn’t fight the HPV off). Our screening procedure is very effective, especially now with the type of techniques they use and the dual test for HPV

[LF87]

Thanks for the replies. Murdock yes I tested positive both times for HPV :( I desperately want it to be gone this time. As I said my friends had hpv plus high grade changes and after the treatment they didn't have hpv anymore. I don't know how that works. I just want it to be normal so badly.
I just get scared it'll have gone from mild to fully blown C in a year and that terrifies me. I did ask the colposcopy lady last year and she said that wouldn't happen.
I shouldn't be too freaked should I? Some of my friends said they can barely remember it all because they weren't really worried at all about it which I just can't wrap my head around?!