Cervical and uterine pain and symptoms

[O_O]

Well, that's what I mean when I say I don't think he's pure narc... like, he never lost his temper with me. I remember I saw him angry one time at work - he was arguing with another director about something and got so angry he kicked a chair and stormed out. But that's the only time I ever saw him really angry. If anything, I was the immature one - and he tended to give into me and we'd do what I wanted to do. Maybe I'm the narc

But yes on the other hand... he loves power and material things and feels very superior. Tbf, though, he IS very smart and attractive and successful so it's not as if he has nothing to be arrogant about. But then also he must be pretty insecure because he loves having his ego stroked.

He shows many hallmarks, for sure, but not everything. I can see something of Russell Brand in him, perhaps, though they look very different!

[Violet Blue]

Well, kicking a chair in a business meeting and storming out does sound a bit like a tantrum - I'm sure his colleagues think he's a first prize dickhead, even if you don't!

Ah, when you wonder if you're the narc - again, that's what they want you to wonder... He's deliberately confusing you, and if you're behaving immaturely it's because he wants you that way for his own ego. I believe he's a lot older than you? He would leave you if you really were that much of a pain, or if he didn't want it to make him look like the grown up.

You'll work it out eventually. I know exactly what you mean about having a very strong chemical attraction for someone. I've had that too, and for me it's lasted over twenty years. I've analysed the crap out of that sitution too - and still do. Like your chap, I would say he's also 'very smart and attractive and successful', and yes I would say that, though he isn't an out and out narcissist, he definitely has narcissistic tendencies. But I'm happy that he's not in my life to thoroughly screw me over, and fortunately I don't want a child with him or anyone else.

I'm sure you'll give it plenty of thought! xxxx

[O_O]

Haha well I don't really think I'm a narc. Only messin. I think I was immature with him because I knew I could get away with it. It was almost a father-daughter type dynamic at times (messed up, I know) and I knew that he'd buy me things and take me to nice places... there was always this kind of reward and discipline thing going on. I guess it sounds pretty weird. But, yes, he definitely liked that dynamic. Problem is, all the nice normal men I meet now seem kind of weak and uninteresting to me. That's my issue to deal with, though.

He wasn't actually that much older, only 6 years. He seemed much older to me, though, because of his job and his lifestyle and his interests.

Anyway, I've seen him exactly twice in the last year and I only speak to him occasionally, just letting him know how I'm doing really, so he doesn't have much influence over me. Although admittedly I think about him a lot and miss him all the time. I definitely dwell on how things could have worked out differently.

I write a lot in my sort of diary thing and that helps a bit. It helps to get everything down on paper so it doesn't keep cluttering up my mind.

Glad you're free of your ex, Violet. In my case I can't yet see that it's for the best but hopefully I will one day.

[WiseMonkey]

Another celebrity narcissist is Russell Brand. He freely admits to this and is now apparently a reformed character with a wife and a young family. There will be a lot about him on the internet.

I think that Russel Brand is a big time attention seeker but not a narcissist. A true high functioning narcissist can't be reformed, it's beyond their capability and they'd never admit to it (besides in jest)! They are incapable of love, it's a foreign concept to them, although they can feign, love, empathy etc. Narcissists are an empty shell, they've buried their true self and replaced it with a false one (known as a mask). They must keep up the facade or the false self at all costs. Being an empty shell, they need others to reflect back to them who they are (and that they exist at all). Narcissists have an addiction so they constantly need narcissistic supply (attention,, which is their drug) positive or negative it's all the same to them. When their 'perfect' mask slips (as it always does) the real, true nasty nature is revealed. Very often it's pure evil.

If you have experienced narcissistic abuse then you have been given a wonderful opportunity to clear your own unhealed childhood wounds and up-level your life so that you are never again vulnerable to or attract narcissists into your life.

Narcissists are attracted to co-dependent types of people who are loving, honest, caring, dutiful, responsible, all the qualities they don't posses. These lovely types are gullible and believe they can change others for their own good and love them back to wholeness. They are a narcissists dream, a guaranteed source of narcissistic supply (attention).

There are different types of narcissists but at their core they all have the same agenda's, it's just the way they go about getting their supply that's different. My ex-husband was a covert narc and so was my mother. My ex-husband's mother was an overt narcissist. I could go on for ages about them but Melanie Tonia Evans is a world's foremost expert on narcissistic abuse and how to recover from it ... she has heaps of fab free resources.
https://www.melanietoniaevans.com/

[Violet Blue]

My heart breaks for the children of narcissists, and being married to one - well that must be just hell. As I said earlier intelligence, or lack of it, has nothing to do with being the victim of one of these people, even if after you've worked it out you can't believe how stupid you were to be taken in by it. (The children of narcissists have no choice of course.)

When I got caught up with a covert narcissist it was a 'perfect storm' of various things which made me vulnerable. I totally get the 'love bombing' and then the true nastiness you get from them. It's as if they're two people, that's how confusing it is, and they are so manipulative. When they realise they can't control you anymore they drop you. But as upsetting as that it, they are doing you a massive favour by leaving you.

The one good thing about being a narcissist's victim is that you can spot them a mile off, it's uncanny how they all behave in the same way. It's only once you've read up about narcissism that you begin to realise what the hell just happened.

[WiseMonkey]

My heart breaks for the children of narcissists, and being married to one - well that must be just hell. As I said earlier intelligence, or lack of it, has nothing to do with being the victim of one of these people, even if after you've worked it out you can't believe how stupid you were to be taken in by it. (The children of narcissists have no choice of course.)

When I got caught up with a covert narcissist it was a 'perfect storm' of various things which made me vulnerable. I totally get the 'love bombing' and then the true nastiness you get from them. It's as if they're two people, that's how confusing it is, and they are so manipulative. When they realise they can't control you anymore they drop you. But as upsetting as that it, they are doing you a massive favour by leaving you.

The one good thing about being a narcissist's victim is that you can spot them a mile off, it's uncanny how they all behave in the same way. It's only once you've read up about narcissism that you begin to realise what the hell just happened.

Yes they all have the same MO...aliens from an alien planet!!

[BlueIris]

My mother was/is a narcissist, although she's mellowed immensely since she hit 80. As a kid, it took me such a long time to realise other people's parents weren't like mine; I was well into my 30s before I stopped fearing both my mother and father.

[Violet Blue]

My mother was/is a narcissist, although she's mellowed immensely since she hit 80. As a kid, it took me such a long time to realise other people's parents weren't like mine; I was well into my 30s before I stopped fearing both my mother and father.

Oh that's so sad to read, BlueIris. Glad you've come out the other side. xxx

[Violet Blue]

Yes they all have the same MO...aliens from an alien planet!!

Ghastly people! xxx

[O_O]

Well, in my case I never saw any 'nastiness' from him. He's never shouted at me, never belittled me, never really lost his temper... nothing at all like that. I've never seen him do anything vindictive or malicious - more, selfish and careless.

He didn't even drop me, really, although it's true that nothing he promised me came to pass.

I've told him exactly what I think of him, which I kind of regret now (I was angry), but he just took it all and agreed with everything I said.

So, idk, perhaps he is more a Russell Brand type than a pure narc.

One thing I can say for sure is that he loves his daughter. Whatever problems he and his partner may have they're doing a great job of bringing up that little girl. They are an excellent mother-father team. I'm pretty jealous :/ If there is one thing he seems to be able to do honestly and without selfishness it is raise his daughter.

I'm sure he's pretty rubbish as a spouse, though, beneath the surface.

If narcs have no empathy and cannot love, what differentiates them from psychopaths??