Cervical and uterine pain and symptoms

[Tinttu]

I don't want to make a promise in case I don't keep it! But yes I'd certainly be more inclined to go back to therapy, and I know that's what I should probably do. Unless a negative result from the doctor cures me of course.

I'm also going to try not to self examine! I have managed to cut down on that a bit. Progress.

I can't believe it. It will not heal you, it might make you feel better for a while until you come up with another worry. I can't believe how little you seem to actually want real help that could really heal you permanently and only focus to your current HA issue.

[O_O]

I suppose it's to do with how legitimate I feel my health concerns are. I feel like they're legitimate, so mental health in secondary. Therein lies the problem, I guess.

I know I'm probably being really stupid.

[pulisa]

They are only "legitimate" based on your own DIY diagnostic theories which are heavily influenced by HA. Wait for the legitimate result-that's if there ever will be one which you can accept?

[O_O]

I think if both the tests are HPV negative, I can accept that.

Also, I know this sounds mental, but I feel like if I get help for the anxiety then I'm admitting that it's all just in my mind and that's sort of jinxing it? Like it's giving the universe an opportunity to play a trick on me. Whereas if I'm prepared for the worst, the universe can't really trick me. Yeah, I know...

[pulisa]

I understand how you wish to stay in control and stay one step ahead but in fact you are tripping yourself up

[poppy77]

'Ithink if both the tests are HPV negative, I can accept that.'


No you won't accept it...you'll doubt the validity of the tests

[pulisa]

There will always be a reason/excuse to doubt the validity of the tests. It's very predictable

[O_O]

I really don't think the home tests are as accurate, I think I may have given myself false hope. I need to wait for the doctor test.

I'm even scared of getting a false positive, which can happen apparently, and getting needlessly anxious.

Anyway, if the doctor test is positive I'm going to make sure I get a colposcopy appointment right away and bypass the gynecology appointment. I wish I hadn't told my mum, because she was so happy at the results, and I don't want to have to tell her they're wrong.

I really hope I get another negative.

[pulisa]

I really don't think the home tests are as accurate, I think I may have given myself false hope. I need to wait for the doctor test.

I'm even scared of getting a false positive, which can happen apparently, and getting needlessly anxious.

Anyway, if the doctor test is positive I'm going to make sure I get a colposcopy appointment right away and bypass the gynecology appointment. I wish I hadn't told my mum, because she was so happy at the results, and I don't want to have to tell her they're wrong.

I really hope I get another negative.

And then what will you do?

[O_O]

And then what will you do?

I'll go to the gynecology appointment since it's arranged, but won't need a colposcopy appointment or acetic acid test probably.