I have suffered from Social Anxiety and Selective Mutism since I was a child but I've only recently found out and told my doctors, I'm currently waiting for a therapist appointment which will take six months. I am an adult now, and have been claiming Universal Credit for over a year. I found it very difficult to tell them my problem and looking for work over the past year has been stressful for me that I ended up being sanctioned though Christmas.
When I told my doctor I was able to get a 'fit note' stating my anxiety that I would send to them for months, until they noticed I was sick for a long time and gave me a form to till for a Health Assessment appointment. I went to that appointment and told them everything. While waiting for the letter on the results, I got a letter from the Job Centre asking to come to a meeting. I was confused, since I'm still off sick, so I rang them in case they hadn't got my note yet and they said I still have to go in regardless if I'm sick or not.
So I did, and I started a new commitment for look for work and also found out that I should have already received the letter from the Health Assessment, so now I have to ring them up and ask for another since it's missing. This woman treated me like dirt, and thought I just didn't bother opening my letters. And because I was scared and confused, I signed to agree to the commitment anyway. So I knew that the letter I don't have yet says I'm still able to look for work.
The problem is it's too much for me, the reason why I have been on Universal Credit for this long is because of how difficult it is for me to find a job with my condition, even just looking for work on the internet gives me so much anxiety and stress that I faked some of my searches just to fill my work book.
I can't answer or make phone calls, when I do it never ends or goes well. Phone calls are the worst, I'd rather talk to them in person! I am expected to make or answer phone calls 5 times a week. When I apply for jobs (and most of them I can't do because they all require good communication ect) sometimes I'd get an email from them asking to phone them or they would phone me, and I would stare at my phone in horror until they stop ringing.
Basically, I signed something I cannot do, but I still need the money or I will have nothing to live on. Half of the money I get from them goes towards the rent (I live with my mother who is also on JSA and also got denied support for her health) so I'm left with what i would get if I was a teen. I try to keep as much as possible, but there's always a gap in the month where I'll have little to no money at all.
I just don't know what to do now, I go for a meeting with another work coach next week and I'm wondering if I tell them or not.