I'm 6 weeks in to my course on citalopram and since I've found this forum to be such a useful resource I thought I'd write a bit about my experience so far.
First week
One Monday afternoon I was struck with a sadness the like of which I've never experienced before in my life. I couldn't stop crying. I have absolutely no reason in my life (that I'm aware of) to be unhappy, so this was quite a scary thing. I let it run on for 4 days, forcing myself to go to work all the while crying in the evening and waking up at 4am. I saw my GP on the Friday, he diagnosed me with moderate depression and prescribed me 10mg of Citalopram along with a referral for mental health. I started taking them in the mornings, but by Monday I was so tired, spending most of the day lying on the couch half asleep (not great with 2 young children in the house). I changed to taking them before bed then the tiredness subsided and I started feeling a bit better. Side effect wise, I lost my appetite completely and I had was a very dry mouth which i fixed by always carrying a bottle of water with me.
I started to keep a diary, the columns were headed Date, Mood, Notes and Tablet time. I'm not sure why I started this, something to do I guess, but it's been invaluable to me so far. Looking back at the diary now I can see that by the end of the first week on the tablets my mood was slowly improving and I had stopped crying every day - this could be that I believed in the tablets, but it could be that they had started to work, who knows.
The worst thing for me was that because there was no obvious trigger for my depression my brain started to find things that might upset or worry me. Two main things have started to be the focus, the fact that my 2 children are starting to grow up and that we have a holiday next year that I'm desperate to be well for (tbh this makes me feel like such a fraud because I know there are people who have had some bad life experiences, but I haven't). I'm hoping my first appointment with the mental health professional next week will help me with these.
Weeks 2 & 3
Life continued and I managed to carry on, appetite returned and no more crying or side effects but I had this weird nervous feeling in my stomach most of the time. Managed to go on a couple of days out with the family but was still not right. Ups and downs I suppose, as I've read a lot on this forum.
Week 4
I switched to taking my tablets at 6pm instead of 9pm at the start of week 4 (can't remember why), and maybe this is a coincidence but my sleep started improving. Started exercising again too. As a result, I felt a bit back to my old self ... so much so that I forgot to take a tablet. I took it when I remembered the next day, but then I went on a night out (which I arranged because I was feeling better) which involved curry, lager and a late night (plus a tablet at midnight). I was ill overnight and had a terrible sleep, this lead to me being right back to square one (tired, crying, feeling like sh*t) for 3 days at the end of week 4.
Week 5
I'm at the end of week 5 now, and can see from my diary that my mood has been slowly improving to the point that yesterday I was almost back to where I was before I forgot that tablet. Today's not been great though (mainly nervous), and because I've stayed on 10mg all this time when I have my 6 week review with my GP next week I might talk about increasing to 20mg because I've read that 10mg is low for an adult.
My work offers CBT training (via cigna - not sure if everyone can register or not), I started that earlier this week but it's not been any help so far, I'm invested in it and want it to work though so I'll give it a chance.
I'm going to try to stay active on this forum because it's been invaluable to me, and I can see that once people start to feel better they might not want to come back here.
Tips:
It's a cliche but for me this has really been a rollercoaster, so if you can see that you're improving then that's a start and try to focus on the improvements. It's easy to get impatient but try to take it a day at a time.
Try to take the tablets at the same time every day and if they tire you out, try taking them in the early evening or before bed.
Keep a diary even if it's just the date and a rough idea of how you feel. I've found it very reassuring to be able to go back over what's happened and see the improvements.
Try to read positive stories about your situation even though it's very tempting to obsess over the negative ones - remember, everyone is different and the best person to talk to about your meds and illness is your GP.
Everyone should totally read the citalopram survival guide (stickied at the top of this forum)
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