Sounds good idea
Bloody hell an hour in traffic before you start wow
What time do you leave and get home?
I think as mums we tend to do most things as we do them quicker, and it’s easy then giving instructions.

Don’t know how old the boys are, but could they take the dog out, say after school.?
Does partner get home before you, could he start the tea( if planned night before)

Re diazepam
I’m no expert! But if your first is 9am it will be at its peak about 1.5 hrs later your anxiety is there but perhaps at a lower level, it may be that it’s wearing off by then 3-4pm hence anxiety getting higher? As it only last about 4-6 hour but stays in your system longer.
So 3-4pm sounds like it’s effects have worn off.

I’m probably more the same age as your mum, I also used to do everything for son and partner(probably do still on good days) now both finished work
but Partner now does
Goes shopping
Does kitchen after tea
Washing machine, and put to dry
Washing 2 cars
Garden, mowing and hedges
And tea 2/3 times week

Son, out at work all day
But know when I’m not good and will ask if I’m ok or need anything (not much, but he’s getter better)

Again, hope all goes well at work tomoz xx