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Thread: Post natal depression

  1. #1
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    Mar 2016
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    Post natal depression

    As the title says really, I'm very much struggling at the moment. In fact I'd say I've completely lost it.

    I feel terrible writing this, but I'm so depressed. I feel completely overwhelmed with everything. Baby is hungry all the time, and has recently started crying every waking hour for no reason, she's sick quite a lot and it's terrifying, it shoots out so far and there's so much of it that it scares me. Midwife's have said it's fine, I don't think it is. Im worried there's something wrong with her, I'm constantly checking her when she's sleeping, but when she starts to wake up I get a feeling of dread, I'm worn out, last night I broke down in the kitchen at 2am crying uncontrollably then locked myself in my bedroom and my partner had to miss a day of work. He says he understands but his employer won't.

    I feel utterly useless, I didn't give birth the right way and now I can't cope or comfort my baby. I love her so much, but I'm feeling like her and dad would be better off without me.
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    Most humans are never fully present in the now, because unconsciously they believe that the next moment must be more important than this one. But then you miss your whole life, which is never not now.
    And that's a revelation for some people: to realize that your life is only ever now. -Eckhart Tolle

  2. #2
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    Re: Post natal depression

    Hi

    This is just a courtesy reply to let you know that your post was moved from its original place to a sub-forum that is more relevant to your issue.

    This is nothing personal - it just enables us to keep posts about the same problems in the relevant forums so other members with any experience with the issues can find them more easily.

    Please also read this post:

    http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=213239
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    Nicola

    “Don't be afraid of death; be afraid of an unlived life. You don't have to live forever, you just have to live.” - Natalie Babbitt

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  3. #3
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    Apr 2011
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    Re: Post natal depression

    is there any way your partner can take paternity leave? he should be able to if he hasn't already

    There are many reason why babies are sick a lot... some are just sicky babies and that is what they do. some drink way to fast so end up being sick. some have reflux and trapped wind, some just drink way too much for the stomach to handle

    If you are worried about the vomiting head to the dr especially if you are bottle feeding (?) because they can test for intolerances and it may just be that her tummy doesn't like that particular type of milk

    and also talk to the dr about how you are feeling xx
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  4. #4
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    Re: Post natal depression

    Aw Katie, I am so sorry you are going through this. Postpartum depression is actually very common. Does your doctor know you are feeling so down? They can help you with it. A lot of moms feel guilt for being depressed when they are "supposed" to be happier than ever. But honestly it's something you can't help. Hormones go all over the place and the stress of a newborn ... I can't imagine even though I'll be right there with you soon. It's a huge life change and from what I have heard, these weeks can be some of the hardest.

    Do you have any other family who can help you out? Parents or friends who can come over, watch baby for a bit while you rest or shower?

  5. #5
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    Re: Post natal depression

    I have family locally but they all work full time. Plus I would feel awful asking someone to watch her, i don't know why.

    My partner is great but there is only so much he can do as he has to work and leaves at 6.30am. I think I'll feel a bit better once I've seen the GP and had my worries addressed. But that's only one part of it. The thought of going out terrifies me, I hate the way I look now and I've never had low self esteem before, I don't want anyone coming round to see baby and i would only go out if I don't have to see anyone.

    Don't get me wrong there are moments of happiness, she's so bloody cute when she's settled(not often) I love holding her and just looking into her eyes and laughing at her daft facial expressions. But mostly I'm down, crying or angry inside. I go to bed for an hour when my partner gets home, but when I have to wake up I feel sick to my stomach at the thought of being responsible for her again. I know that i need to speak to someone because I'm afraid of my own thoughts lately, I feel so badly about myself it's as if I hate myself and i don't know how this has started.
    __________________
    Most humans are never fully present in the now, because unconsciously they believe that the next moment must be more important than this one. But then you miss your whole life, which is never not now.
    And that's a revelation for some people: to realize that your life is only ever now. -Eckhart Tolle

  6. #6
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    Re: Post natal depression

    Quote Originally Posted by venusbluejeans View Post
    is there any way your partner can take paternity leave? he should be able to if he hasn't already
    .
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    Emmz xx

    nolite te basstardes carborundorum





  7. #7
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    Re: Post natal depression

    Quote Originally Posted by venusbluejeans View Post
    .
    Sorry yes he's already had it, I mean he could book in annual leave if needs be to help me out, but I just feel awful for it.
    __________________
    Most humans are never fully present in the now, because unconsciously they believe that the next moment must be more important than this one. But then you miss your whole life, which is never not now.
    And that's a revelation for some people: to realize that your life is only ever now. -Eckhart Tolle

  8. #8
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    Apr 2011
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    Re: Post natal depression

    ahhh ok.... don't feel bad about needing him to take time off.... even if it is just a day so you can spend the day in bed catching up on sleep
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    Emmz xx

    nolite te basstardes carborundorum





  9. #9
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    Re: Post natal depression

    Quote Originally Posted by venusbluejeans View Post
    ahhh ok.... don't feel bad about needing him to take time off.... even if it is just a day so you can spend the day in bed catching up on sleep
    I agree ... you have been through a mental and physical rollercoaster for the past 9+ months. It's okay to ask for help to recover. You have to recover on TOP of taking care of a new baby. And that baby is just as much your partner's responsibility too. I encourage you to reach out to somebody for some support

  10. #10
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    Jun 2014
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    8,273

    Re: Post natal depression

    Me too. Do you have a health visitor you could talk to, Katie? If you are developing post natal depression it's vital that you get help now. It's nothing to be ashamed of-far from it. Don't suffer in silence

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