Relapse! Coping, Symptoms and Tips.

[Fishmanpa]

For a minute there I thought I was on the wrong thread and reading 'Pets Galore'

Our Pixie Bob is quite an affectionate cat when he wants to be but I think that's pretty normal with most cats. That said, after a long cold winter's day, there's nothing like a nice warm beverage and my boy curled up and purring next to me. When I was going through my and my wife's health issues, he didn't leave my side. There's something very soothing and calming about our furry companions and good therapy IMO.

Positive thoughts

[Darksky]

Our Pixie Bob is quite an affectionate cat when he wants to be but I think that's pretty normal with most cats. That said, after a long cold winter's day, there's nothing like a nice warm beverage and my boy curled up and purring next to me. When I was going through my and my wife's health issues, he didn't leave my side. There's something very soothing and calming about our furry companions and good therapy IMO.

Positive thoughts

Totally agree FMP.


well Mrs.C you obviously haven't heard of the Foot Monster. Absolutely everyone knows if you leave you foot outside the covers at night, it will be grabbed by the FM. As to what happens next, no one has lived to tell the tale.

[Carnation]

Lol Darksky, yes I have been attacked by the foot monster and my feet don't even have to be out of the covers.
I think it's called, "don't ignore me, I want something and you're asleep".

I agree fishmanpa.
And cats have a sixth sense when you need comforting.
I know you have a gorgeous cat.
I don't know what yours weight, but mine is twice the size of a normal cat, it's not overfed, it's naturally big and weighs in old metric, over a stone.
That's a lot of weight diving on me in the morning.

[Fishmanpa]

I agree fishmanpa.
And cats have a sixth sense when you need comforting.
I know you have a gorgeous cat.
I don't know what yours weight, but mine is twice the size of a normal cat, it's not overfed, it's naturally big and weighs in old metric, over a stone.
That's a lot of weight diving on me in the morning.

Thanks ... I'm very partial but Socrates really is a beautiful creature. You certainly have a big cat too! Pixies are big cats as cats go and Socrates weighs in at 17lbs (his Dad was over 20lbs) and is solid as a rock. There have been times he's jumped up on the bed and landed on me but he's just more inclined to nonchalantly walk all over me and make use of my torso as a bed (and you have to love him making biscuits on your bladder ~lol~)

And that 6th sense? Socrates knew I was sick before I was diagnosed. He was sniffing my neck and lying next to my head and neck in the months prior to my diagnosis. And when I was done treatment and in recovery, he would coax me out of my chair by bringing toys to me and dropping them in my lap so I'd get up and play. I'm 100% convinced after sharing my life with this amazing creature for over 9 years, that they know a lot more and are more intelligent than we give them credit for.

Positive thoughts

[Carnation]

Aww fishmanpa, that was very moving to read.
My cat certainly pulled me out of what felt like a bottomless pit. Pets are much more than pets.

[DustingMyselfOff]

Ahhhh, now we're talking my language..... the wonder and marvel of animals. Have had many rabbits, and named one "Thumper" because of the way he would thump his back legs on the floor. Actually, there's probably very few animals that I HAVEN'T had as pets, and I'm always open to any and all. Spending my days with cats at the shelter has reminded me how uniquely different each one can be, and how amazing they all are.

About the sister who doesn't answer the phone? That's me! It's not so much fear of bad news - it's more like fear of 1) getting trapped into a long conversation with someone who rambles on and on and, 2) being forced to give an answer on the spot without having time to think about it first. And actually in this day and age, I find phone calls rather rude. The caller is basically saying "I want to talk to you RIGHT NOW so stop whatever you're doing and answer the phone." Or that's how I see it. In case of emergency, of course call someone, but if it can be texted or emailed or written, that's a lot more convenient for the recipient.

My funk seems to have lifted. I woke up in a very good mood yesterday and today and have had a lot of energy throughout the day and been very content. It might have something to do with the clean eating I've been doing..... keeping my carbs VERY low and I always feel better, physically and mentally, when I cut out all the sugar and breads and potatoes and starches. Not easy to do, but it gets easier the longer you do it.

I agree, Mrs. C.... it's not so much the things we fear, it's how we react to those fears. So we have to stop fearing the fear.
Sue

[Carnation]

Hi Sue,

A much more positive sounding post from you.
Anxiety certainly is a roller-coaster with the occasional bumper ride, runaway train and crazy mirrors.
No wonder we get exhausted being at the fair everyday.

Yesterday Mr C put me in a right tricky situation.
We went to one of our regular shops which is more than a shop because its more of a social gathering of people we know quite well.
The manager was there who we've known for many years and it was her first appearance since her husband died just before Christmas. I won't go in to the details for obvious reasons, but it was going to be emotional seeing her and knew there would be a conversation about it.
I was prepared for that, but the family dog had died too and Mr C walked away saying he didn't want to hear about it, for emotional reasons.
I couldn't walk away and was left hearing all the details of both the husband and the dog which caused the person to break down and resulted with me crying as well.
I was ok apart from Wilko saying to me, "you can't move or you must run", but I managed to stay in the zone, all though not a pretty one, but was quite upset with Mr C just leaving me to deal with it all on my own.
His answer was, "I can't deal with situations like that" to which my reply was, "And you think I can?"
It was about half an hour and I hadn't a clue where he had gone. I eventually found him and his reason was, "Well you have to be on your own sometime". "Yeah, but what a situation to be deserted in".
But hey, on the positive side, I managed it and also was there for this person.
Maybe Mr C did some good, but my trust has gone out the window and as I suffer with agoraphobia, it could affect any future ideas of going further afield.
My brain wants to work out what I should do if a similar situation should arise. And all I can think of is, "try to stay normal".

[Carnation]

Sue, no potatoes? I couldn't do without my tatties.

[DustingMyselfOff]

I have so many emotions running through me after reading your post and your experience with the grieving woman, and with Mr. C. I don't know how you're handling things between you and Mr. C right now but I know I would be holding a lot of resentment and anger, and probably being cold as ice towards him. I hope you are handling it better than I would, but his comment stabbed me in the heart and stomach and I am going to remain annoyed at him for a long time, and you can tell him I said so! Because I'm sure he really cares that some woman on the other side of the planet is angry with him for a comment he made.

And I think you now have every right to say "No" the next time he wants to go there again. If YOU are somehow in the mood, then fine, but if you are going just for him, forget it. He told you that you need to be on your own sometime? Well, then perhaps he needs to start going to the shops on his own sometimes.

He blew it big time, and I'm sorry for saying negative things about him, and I'm sure he's a wonderful man and partner, but yesterday he performed an epic fail. Hugs to you for having to deal with it, and having to deal with it alone, especially when he's the one that dragged you there.

I think somehow this is going to make you stronger. You're going to stand up to him more and you're going to realize that you absolutely can and will be just fine on your own sometimes.
Sue

[Carnation]

Thank you for that Sue

I did wonder after posting whether I was over playing the whole thing, but hey, Mr C couldn't even talk to the woman.
Yes, Mr C is a good man, but he does think he looks after me all the time! And it's not like that at all. It took a therapist to make me realise that. He blames my condition, but normal people have their likes and dislikes and what they do and don't feel comfortable with.
Last night I had it all out with him, there was no way I was going to take my anger and disappointment to bed. And yes, I was angry.
When he said he looks after me, I didn't hasten to tell him that I cook, clean and make good home for him.
I'm afraid I also brought up that I looked after his mum with personal care involved for 8 years, which I sorted of regretted because he's still getting over losing his mum, but anger tends to release all sorts of past events.
But I was in full flow and reminded him that I packed everything when we moved and then unpacked everything.
I also did most of the clearing of his mum's home and dealing with her clothes etc. He did one room, I did the rest.
I also worked my socks off in his business and took care of everything when he was ill.
See you can tell I'm mad.
Anyway, it's off my chest now, I've let him know my feelings on the matter and life carries on.
But thanks for your support Sue. x