Relapse! Coping, Symptoms and Tips.

[glassgirlw]

Hi glassgirlw,
You have more nerve than me to say that name, but I understand that the f***y word has a different take in the U.S.
As for the coughing, that may be the culprit for my chest pain, maybe the constant pressure on a muscle, although I'm not coughing now.
It can take a while for a cough to go, but lots of fluids and an old fashioned remedy of Vicks on the chest normally helps.
Spring is definitely on its way. My garden is showing signs of buds on the shrubs and blossom on the trees.

oh no!!! I didn’t know there was a different meaning I had to go google that so I apologize for any offense!!! It’s crazy to me how the exact same word has such a different meaning depending on where you’re from lol. I may have to start researching before I post on a primarily UK site lol.

I can’t wait to see the little buds and blooms in my flower beds. Unfortunately historically it’s into late March / early April here before the “cold weather” flowers start to peak out at us. One of my favorite things about spring is that the humidity starts to increase (great for my perpetually dry skin all winter) and the storms start to roll back in. I’m a big fan of the thunderstorm. I know from reading past posts that they can be a trigger for your anxiety, and I was the same for many many years. I think for me it’s been exposure therapy that has gotten me past it. Where I live in the states is considered right in the middle of “Tornado Alley”, and thank God I’ve never been up close with one. But it still has helped my storm anxiety for some reason.

[Carnation]

Oh no, thunderstorms is one of biggest fears and I have been exposed many times. Its more the lightening to be honest. Its something that has unfortunately got worse for me, no matter what I do, I'm still petrified.
I started a thread on this for fellow sufferers.

[Carnation]

I popped out this afternoon with Mr C.
The weather eventually improved and we drove to a village about 20 minutes away.
All the time I was out I felt like my legs couldn't carry me, my head felt wobbly and I couldn't wait to come home.
This was only about an hour, but seemed like forever.
No matter how I try to reassure myself I'm ok, my walking feels so scary because I can't feel confident and the bad thoughts come flooding in.
It's so difficult to keep reassuring yourself nothing is going to happen to you and its just the thoughts feeding you wrong information. It's like fighting yourself all the time and it honestly makes me want to scream with frustration.
Just putting one foot in front of the other is like walking a tightrope and it's so exhausting.
I can't seem to get myself to where I was a year ago when I moved house.
I'm not a defeatist, I'm not weak, but anxiety is one tough ordeal.

[MamaCass]

Hi Carn,
Sorry you had another anxious day out. I know exactly how that feels and the frustration that comes with it all. At the moment as you know im struggling badly myself. But we are here for you. We are in the chatroom at the moment if you need to talk about anything x

[glassgirlw]

Mrs C I 100% can sympathize with every one of the symptoms you mention. On a good day I’m in all the shops and having no issues. On a bad day...well it’s just like you described. I can preach advice all day on here about self talk and whatnot but it’s so hard to apply to myself in the moment. I don’t have any wise words for you other than what you’ve already told yourself, just that know you’re not alone!!

my husband and I are getting ready to head to a shop here and get a bite to eat. I hope tomorrow is better for you!!

[Carnation]

Aww, thanks Cass
I'm sorry you are suffering too hun
might pop in later x

Glassgirlw, it's a relief to feel you are not alone in the way you feel and yes, it's much easier to help someone else than yourself. I do have good days, lots of fair days, but the bad days are still so debilitating.
I hope you enjoy your meal. x

[Carnation]

I'm still suffering with my bile and acid reflux and my sinus issues. Ones coming up and the other is going down and when they meet in the middle I have these uncontrollable coughing fits. Neither seems to want to go away.

On a good note...
I made it a bit of breakthrough yesterday with my anxiety.
Normally if I was popping out somewhere, the tension would build and by the time I stepped out of the front door my eyes wouldn't focus properly, my legs would be like jelly amongst a load of other feelings.
So I'm going out highly sensitised and by the time I get there I'm a pack of nerves counting the seconds until I return home to safety, or what I perceive as safety.
What I should be doing is desensitising before I leave the house. I'm not talking about meditation or breathing exercises or twenty minutes of yoga, although if you feel the need to do that, it's probably going to help.
I'm talking about gradually adjusting to something that makes you fearful, like going out into the big wide world.
So yesterday, I took myself into the garden for about half an hour, climatised to the fresh air and the change of temperature. Then went back inside. Then after about ten minutes we left to go out. Still feeling quite over-sensitised but that's the norm for me.
And instead of arriving in the high street and dragging my wobbly head and legs around in constant agony, we stopped the car just outside the town and pulled up near a bench in a quiet area. We got out and just sat for a while until I could feel a shift in my overall feelings.
We then had a short walk around, got back in the car and drove to the far end of the town where it wasn't so busy, but there were a few shops.
We went into one and browsed, not really wanting anything in there, but the exercise was to adjust and desensitise.
We then moved the car into the crux of the town and went into one of our more regular shops.
It's the first time I've felt calm, relaxed and dare I say normal in that shop for months!
Thinking it may be a fluke and negative thoughts arising, "that was just a one off", but it wasn't. We went into several shops, chatted to people in each one for at least ten minutes and the wobbling had gone. I was calm, I was normal and I was full of confidence.
It even started to hammer down with rain, but it didn't bother me. Mr C was ready to run me back to the car and I just said, "it's only a bit of rain". "Did I just say that", I thought. And lastly before we went home, Mr C wanted some of his favourite cake from our local shop.
"That's ok, you wait in the car, I'll run in and get it for you".
He was waiting for some time as I got caught up with an elderly man who was buying cat food which triggered off a conversation about how he used to care for rescued animals. So there I was, a good ten minutes on my own, waiting in a queue chatting to a total stranger, soaking wet from the rain.
And as I looked down at this man's feet I noticed he was wearing slippers.
"My God", I thought. "If an elderly gentleman can go out in the pouring rain in his slippers for cat food, then I shouldn't fear popping in for a bit of cake".
And as I opened the door for the man to leave carrying his tightly packed box of provisions for kitty, he turned to me and said, "thank you darling, I appreciate that".
Mr C soon changed the mood when I returned to the car when he said, "where you been, baking it?"
Anyway, you get the gist.
Slowly and calmly adjust to anything that makes you fearful. That includes cooking in the kitchen.
Maybe peel the potatoes early, leave them in pot until you want to use them. Don't try and do everything at once if you can't face it. x

[DustingMyselfOff]

I can't believe it's been over 10 days since I've been on here! Without getting the email notifications that there are new posts, I never remember to come check on my own, darn it!!!!

Ah yes, the f@nny pack! I never walk the dogs without one! But there's no way that would work for me for other outings - I have everything but the kitchen sink in my purse since us anxious types are ready for ANYTHING. My "medical emergency" portion of my bag takes up most of it. :( And yes, the change purse..... the weight adds up quickly so we need to remember to keep removing that since it's hardly ever required anywhere anymore.

Oh, and I can relate to how our significant others can instantly destroy our moods. I had the most glorious day yesterday, was out running errands, enjoying blasting my music in my car and singing along, went to the gym and had a good workout, came home energetic and content, and the first sentence out of hubby's mouth annoyed me and the mood was totally gone. I'm fine today because he's at work but when he gets home I'll probably still have some residual annoyance.

Life in general is really good at the moment, and I am succeeding in not letting things I can't control worry me (such as corona virus and hubby's job status which is yet to be determined). I'm soaking up the good stuff and minimizing the bad as best I can. But.... it only took me 63 years of hard knocks (and retiring from my stressful job) to get here!
Sue

[Carnation]

Wow! You go girl
Yes, I know you're a grown woman, but sounds like you rocking it.
And I too love my new f@nny bag, I'll just use a suitcase on wheels, one of those executive ones) for other outings

[Carnation]

So, we have yet another storm, one I pronounce wrongly.
That's practically a whole month of storms, probably longer. This winter has been miserable and lengthy with very little sun, but I'm trying to remember what my mum used to say, "In like a lion, out like a lamb". That's for March and that's tomorrow, so not long now before we can benefit from some better weather.
It's got to the point where I don't want to do indoor jobs anymore. I'm a keen gardner and everything's been put on hold with my seeding and weeding.
And how can I desensitise, if its peeing down with rain all the time.
On a good note, my rib pain seems better. I've stopped doing stupid things like overreaching, carrying heavy stuff and twisting my head round like an owl.
I've also improved with my bloated tummy and all the wonderful noises that come from it.
Changing a few things in my diet has worked well for me.
Porridge in the morning seems to settle any muck I throw down my gullet.
The one thing I can't seem to take is oil. Whether it's a drizzle on a piece of meat or from canned tuna. Fatty meat a no no and citrus fruits. If you make a just a few changes in your diet, you'll be surprised at the results and it relieves a lot of the anxiety too.