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Thread: Relapse! Coping, Symptoms and Tips.

  1. #2711
    Join Date
    May 2014

    Re: Relapse! Coping, Symptoms and Tips.

    So pleased you a feeling a little better
    Brilliant you got the all clear.

    It's so good for us to have pets, it actually takes the focus away from us and our worries.

    I've also been reading that it is good to have some structure in your day. Even think about what you might do the day before. It's so easy to do nothing but wallow in our thoughts. You know, we are far more capable than we think we are and our bodies are also far more capable. x

  2. #2712
    Join Date
    May 2014

    Re: Relapse! Coping, Symptoms and Tips.

    Hi All ��

    I'm starting to feel a bit better.
    I've definitely been in a spiral of a build up and stress that resulted in another relapse.
    We all tend to keep pushing ourselves and fighting anxiety, but sometimes we need some timeout, whether it's a few days or few weeks. The body and mind need to regain their calm. And I've been doing just that.
    I've let my body rest and only do what I know is good for me, like a gentle walk, tending to my garden, yoga, gentle exercise, massage and most importantly, sleep.
    What really has been helping me is guided meditation which is available in all forms on the Internet.
    I particularly like mapping meditation because it helps with the worry of sensations and symptoms.
    For me, it's the sensations and symptoms that put me in a downward spiral and a rotation of worry, anxious, panic, worry, anxious, panic.
    Guided Meditation has most definitely helped with that.
    There's the worry for most that the sensations and symptoms will not go away and something dreadful is occurring. They do go away. It's not a permanent state and it's not something deadly, it's all down to anxiety.
    They are familiar feelings, we've all felt them before, but for some reason our brain begins to go off on a journey of fearing the worst possible explanations.
    We then make it worse by comparing these symptoms to such scary material on Google.
    We've all done it, regret doing it, then seek others that feel the same things to get confirmation that you don't have something deadly and revert back to hoping its just anxiety.
    Don't get me wrong, anxiety can be a very powerful condition of stressful bodily symptoms, but this can and does diminish in time.
    Patience and care will undoubtedly help.
    All your body is trying to tell you is to take time out, do the things that make you feel good, get rest and sleep and sort those niggling problems that so overhang and cloud your life.
    Relapses are not nice and it's not another journey to where you were when you initially broke down.
    It's just a reminder that life has got just a bit too much and you need that tlc. x

  3. #2713
    Join Date
    May 2014

    Re: Relapse! Coping, Symptoms and Tips.

    I'm plodding on in this strange world that has become.
    Taking all the relaxing methods I can think of.
    Also got round to those niggling jobs that I see everytime I walk into a room. I've put up one string of fairy lights to remind me that Christmas will still be coming despite the doom and gloom in the world.
    I've stopped watching TV altogether and just use my IPAD to watch stuff I like. Too many programmes on the TV relating to death and illness. It's much more enjoyable watching a film lying on the bed wrapped up in a duvet anytime.
    I still have high anxiety but my oversensitised body is starting to calm a bit.
    With the help of guided meditation, affirmations and relaxing daily, I definitely feel less jittery and lightheaded.
    I'm trying to live in the moment and at the moment my life seems to be resembling that of a cat... Eat, sleep, wash, walkabout a bit and eat again. I'll start to get worried if I start chasing mice.
    As you know I read a lot of stuff. And although tips for regaining your former self help, time seems to be the essence in recovery.
    I think that applies to grieving too as I still have issues with my mum's passing. I know there's a certain amount of guilt in the mix. Especially as I was in control of her life in the end. And although I try not to be so hard on myself because I know I did all that was physically and mentally possible, I'm still left feeling I could have done more.
    This is a very common situation and I wonder whether this could be another bolt for my anxiety. Or is it just a normal process of feeling this way.
    Past is past, you can't change it. The future you can!
    Anyway, hope all is well with everyone. Sending hugs to All

  4. #2714
    Join Date
    Sep 2012

    Re: Relapse! Coping, Symptoms and Tips.

    Hi Carnation l totally understand the feeling of guilt l nursed my dad till he passed away, l felt like that l think it's part of the process of losing them,

    You have to try and let that feeling go you couldn't of done anymore, you need to realise how strong you our for doing what you did not everyone could and especially with all your own issues too.

    I know your mum will be looking down at you with pride, you truly are amazing all you have been through, l know the experience of losing my dad has made my anxiety worse but l also no l was privileged to help him and have such a beautiful dad I'm sure you feel the same about your mum your a very strong lady take care xxxx

  5. #2715
    Join Date
    May 2014

    Re: Relapse! Coping, Symptoms and Tips.

    What lovely words Mrs S and so true!
    We seem to punish ourselves for caring.
    You too Mrs S. You are strong and stronger than anxiety! xx

  6. #2716
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    , , United Kingdom.

    Re: Relapse! Coping, Symptoms and Tips.

    Its been a good while since I posted on your thread Carnation, too long in fact. I agree with so much you say regarding anxiety. I think there are periods where we become inured to it, where symptoms become so ingrained that we forget the state of being calm. And then the question of whether we battle against it or go the Claire Weekes way by letting it wash over us. Accepting isn't easy though of course.

    I did try some yoga myself recently, an American lady who seems quite popular on youtube. However I did get some strange looks from our black lab when on breathing out, I had to buzz like a bee. I need to try some more. This year I've taken up exercise, not just for physical reasons but in the hope it might benefit anxiety. The jury is still out on that one and while fitter I haven't seen (or felt) much evidence of a change. I think exercise maybe needs to be supplemented by meditation or relaxation exercises.

    I'm with you on the watching of TV this year. With Covid the news is endless doom and have found the TV is only on when Mrs F is down here, which isn't much as she's shielding again. I much prefer to watch on demand where I can choose a good documentary. I think you're doing very well Carnation, you've always shown a positive attitude and tackled your problems head on. Do look after yourself and of course, keep safe.
    'It was a wedding ring, destined to be found in a cheap hotel, lost in a kitchen sink, or thrown in a wishing well' - Marillion, Clutching at Straws, 1987

  7. #2717
    Join Date
    May 2014

    Re: Relapse! Coping, Symptoms and Tips.

    Hi fishman, good to hear from you!

    I've been reading your posts and have to say you have been coping incredibly well.
    You might agree with me when I say it's not the coping that's the problem, it's the suffering.
    And I've always said that empathic people are the ones that tend to suffer with anxiety.
    I've also said that we can't change our makeup.
    Although we can learn to perceive and process upset and worry in a more wellbeing way.
    It also tends to be the case that people that suffer with anxiety have the world on their shoulders, whether that's caring for others, working in a caring sector or suffered trauma and experienced illness and pain.
    All of those things mentioned can stay with us for a very long time.
    So we look for releases. As you say, yoga, exercise, meditation or joining a forum for like-minded people.
    When you realise there are many folk suffering the same as you, it lessens the pain somewhat.
    We know we shouldn't be so hard on ourselves or see ourselves as the person with the magic wand, but because we are caring people, that's exactly what we do and in the process our own wellbeing takes a backseat.
    So I'm pleased to hear you are trying ways to help that fishman. Because you are important to do so.
    We ALL are important and deserve to feel better. x

  8. #2718
    Join Date
    May 2013

    Re: Relapse! Coping, Symptoms and Tips.

    Hi Gang.
    Taking a break from shelter work to check in on my friends and support group. Everyone seems to still have that will and undying commitment to conquering this thing, so dag-nabbit - it will get conquered!

    Regarding guided meditations, they are the only kind I can do. I've tried so many times and in so many ways to not use guided but I am just not successful. Guided ones are my favorite, but what I've been doing the past few months is chanting Buddhist mantras and I really feel the difference. There is one that you are supposed to repeat 108 times, once or twice a day, and I've only done that a few times, but even if I only chant it for 5 minutes on the way to work or while lying in bed when I can't sleep, I feel so much more peace and calm. I even bought myself some chanting beads which help you keep track of when you've reached the 100 mark and that is soothing, too.

    If anyone wants to hear more about this particular mantra, he explains it well:

    I'm actually giving in and doing something that I have fantasized, but had anxiety about, for ....oh, probably 20 years. I'm going to have a housecleaner come in and give me a quote to clean my house, top to bottom thoroughly, and then maybe once or twice a month after that to keep it that way. I have always thought this was just for the rich and famous but come to find out, many "common folk" use housekeepers regularly! I've always thought I would be too nervous about having a stranger in the house, but with my flexible hours now I could be in the yard with the dogs or I could be in my home office working, or if I'm at the shelter, hubby would be home doing his job (thanks to COVID). My other anxiety (and excuse) for years has been the dogs, but there is nothing wrong with either keeping them out in the fenced yard for an hour or two, or locking them into the home office with me while someone else cleans. And the biggest anxiety? I don't want anyone to find some of the dirt in my house, so I would probably spend days cleaning before I allowed someone in and then I wouldn't need one! So I'm having someone come over Monday afternoon to give me a quote and I'm trying to resist the urge to vacuum and dust before she gets here. LOL

    Since my promotion and raise, I can finally justify doing something like this, IF it's not too God-awful expensive and if I feel comfortable with the person. I think I'll do a little extra chanting before her visit. LOL

  9. #2719
    Join Date
    May 2014

    Re: Relapse! Coping, Symptoms and Tips.

    I do so miss you not been around so much on the forum Sue, (sorry if that sounds needy) x
    You always seem to bring some positivity to the thread.

    I too have started chanting. It's on my new board of collage tips for wellbeing and happiness.
    'Om' apparently is a primal sound which existed before the birth of the universe and represents the existence of everything! Then you have Yam, Vam, Ham, Ram, and Lam. (would make good names for characters in a kids programme or maybe members of a pop group, lol).
    Seriously though. I do practice these sounds. Mr C thinks I keep calling him or thinks I have hurt myself.
    I do think it helps, especially the 'OM'. Because one day I was doing it I burst into tears and felt better for it.
    Vibrations is life. Everything alive has a vibration and energy. Have you ever held a pendant in your hand over the inner of your palm and noticed its independent circular movement. It's all energy.
    Without knowing it we absorb bad energy from people that carry not so great energy. And needy people zap the good energy from people leaving them fatigued.
    Empathetic people suffer with this and they need time alone to recharge.
    It's all very interesting and not to be dismissed.
    This is why some people suffer so greatly in their workplace or with their family.
    The words... draining and stressful come to mind.
    It's very important who we associate with, who we listen to, who we look up to or learn from.
    Our brains are computers and we need the right information going in. The difference being, we can't delete our info going in, but we can change its responses.
    So everytime a bad memory appears it stays in the past and not in our present and future.
    I'll stop there before I get too preachy myself.

    Let's get on to lighter things like your lighter housework duties.
    I agree about a stranger touching your personal belongings or even being in the household. But! If you get the right person, it can be a godsend.
    I have a friend who does this for a living and she became great friends with whom she worked for. Not too friendly, because you wouldn't want that either. The thing is you have to make that judgement at the start and that can be difficult. And do you want utter professionalism or a casual friendly approach! Remember you may even have to pay sickness and holidays, unless you use an agency. They are all things to be considered Sue.
    Although for the time being the world is going in to Lock-down so it might not happen for some time.

    We got the news last night. Another lock down lasting a minimum of 4 weeks with a possible extension.
    Most of us expected it, even prepared for it.
    Does it make it any easier? Of course not.
    We start to worry about our health, our mental wellbeing, our sanity! And no sunny days to sit in the garden or potter about in like the first time. Although I do still go in the garden wrapped up for as much as the weather allows me to.
    We will adapt, come through and mark 2020 as a year that was.
    Maybe we will appreciate life more when we eventually come out of this whirlwind of fear and weirdness.
    Maybe we will gain more inner strength.
    Let's try to think of it all as being the making of our future life as stronger and less fearful at the end of it all.
    Sending hugs to All

  10. #2720
    Join Date
    May 2013

    Re: Relapse! Coping, Symptoms and Tips.

    Hi Mrs. C.
    I would post on here every day if I remembered to! I used to get email alerts when there was a new post in this thread but those don't happen anymore. So feel free to ping me in a private message if I've been gone for more than a few days because I DO get email alerts of those and it will prompt me to log in here. Otherwise, I log onto my computer, check email, and then get on to work stuff or household chores.

    Regarding a cleaning lady, I think I would only have one come in only once or twice a month so I don't think that would require sick days and holidays. Some agencies send a different person every trip, or you can hire a private individual who would be the only one to come to your home. I have a small company coming to give me a quote tomorrow and she said she would send the same person each time, so I will have to see how comfortable I am with that person once they've been here a few times. The biggest factor will have to be "they must love dogs" because one of mine is over 150 pounds - he will have to like her and vice versa.

    Be well, my friends.

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