Relapse! Coping, Symptoms and Tips.

[Carnation]

Thank you catkins x

[Carnation]

I thought 'Freedom Day' a ideal day to catch up on this thread before I venture out to see if it really is 'Freedom Day'. Freedom from what? Fear? No, that still seems apparent amongst the people. To do what you want freely? No. Still rules in most of the shops and rules with travelling and indoor venues. Freedom of speech and choice? Nope. Still a divide and a lot of stone throwing at people that don't comply. Just look at the Covid / Vaccine threads on this Site as an example. So maybe I won't get excited and just concentrate on 'Freedom from Anxiety'.
So I've had some good days, some not so good days and days that are neither good or bad.
But! I got back in the car again and had a short drive. The first time in a couple of years. It wasn't planned, it just came over me to 'want to' do it. And that's half if not most of the battle. Us anxiety sufferers do tend to react to the way we feel. A bit off, strange, weird sensations, bodily reactions. It's got to be a go for it and sod all of that with bells on. And everyone is capable of one of those moments. And when you get that moment it's the most wonderful feeling when you want to punch the air and shout out "Yes, take that anxiety, I'm stronger than you".
On my good days I've been shopping, trying on clothes, browsing shelves in shops, chatting to passers by and even stepped into a supermarket, albeit a small one, but all these things were avoided or painful to endure.
What changed? I suppose mindset, confidence, determination and faith.
As you know I've had a sort of kitchen phobia for quite some time and I'm in there far more now. I still have my moments but not as bad and found myself making homemade coleslaw one afternoon. Again, it just came over me. I'd anyone struggles with this kitchen anxiety, just keep going, small doses to begin of just being in there, standing, doing nothing, maybe looking out of the window, looking around the room, sing a song if it takes your fancy, just get used to being there. Don't run if you feel edgy or anxious, stay and feel and it will subside. Running or rushing will fuel the anxiety. Stop what you are doing if you feel overwhelmed. Think about how you feel, then carry on. It's thoughts, that's all. You are stronger than those thoughts. x

[Carnation]

So many of my fellow anxiety sufferers have been suffering in the heat. Its probably the worst weather condition as it makes us feel like we are hot flushing and not hydrated. At least in the cold we have control by controlling our own heat. That's another aspect of a heatwave, we have no control and have to wait for nature to relieve us from uncomfortable sleeping, exhaustion, sweating and high UV burning. And nature does sort it out. During times like this, don't try to prove you are wonder woman or superman, go with the flow and use this time to relax and take life easy. Before you know it you will be thinking about where to get your turkey from for Christmas Day. So, try not to hurry away a summer period of heat and just adjust your day accordingly. Shop early or late in the day. Air all the bedding, curtains and throws so you have them smelling nice and fresh. Enjoy the growth in the garden and for veg growers, feel proud of what you have grown. Enjoy the wildlife that you rarely see in the winter. Read and relax. Do your yoga or exercise in the garden at the start of your day. Be free of wearing lots of clothes and feel the air on your skin while vitamin D tops up your immune system. And don't be so fearful of a natural element that has its beneficiaries too.

[Catkins]

It's so difficult in the heat. Thankfully we've cooled down a little.

[Carnation]

It's been a while since I did a catch up.
I've been up, down, so so, panicky and moments of great achievement. A mixed bag of emotions and feelings.
Last weekend my oven packed up and at first it through me into turmoil and anxiety. My first thought was to do that thorough clean I kept threatening to do but kept putting off. And now I was cleaning the damn thing with no heat to shift the grime but my elbow grease was certainly helping with the annoyance of the thing breaking down. It's something like this that affects my routine, especially eating and food that sets off alarm bells with my anxiety. I had to replan my meals, go without my normal foods, alter my shopping delivery, phone the landlord and give him the bad news. And now I'm more adjusted to the inconvenience and a new oven has arrived and will be fitted tomorrow.
It makes me realise how routine has become a cog in my life and when something like this happens it doesn't mean anything at all. You have to take each day separately and deal with whatever arises.
And that applies to anxiety too.
The times I've got anxious about what might happen and the outcome has never been as bad as what I overthink.
I am a thinker and was from a child, but sometimes you just need to go with the flow and shut the brain off from dissecting every little thing we do or what happens to us.
I forget to remind myself of my achievements and notice any improvements, but they are there, no matter how small. We just need to be aware of them.

[Catkins]

I do like routine too especially when I'm anxious and I've even started putting things like reading in my weekend schedule. Definitely I seem to do well with a plan.

[Carnation]

Routines are good if you have a balance. Self care and enjoyment should always be part of your day.

[Catkins]

Definitely!

[Carnation]

Dreaming!
Oh boy, do I dream. Every night. Sometimes 2-3 dreams a night. And it used to bother me until I found out it was the minds way of processing and dealing with trauma and grief while you sleep.
Recently I have been dreaming about experiences that might happen to me during the day or quite recently.
This pleases me because it can only mean that my mind is dealing with stuff immediately rather than letting issues fester inside causing bodily symptoms and anxiety.
If you dream about past events then you haven't dealt with the pain from the past. We tend to shelve or clam up about any hurt or trauma that we can't deal with at the time, so dreaming about the past is our brains way of processing.
Never be afraid of dreams. It's a good thing.

[Catkins]

I'm quite a vivid dreamer. Perhaps not so much recently because of the sedative action of the promethazine. I did however dream the other night that something went wrong with my legs and I had to go in a wheelchair. It was odd I didn't feel afraid of it, just accepting.