Hi all,
I wanted to ask something that I think may be related to the DP/DR disorder. Ever since I was a kid, I noticed that when I go someplace, I sort of "absorb" the atmosphere of that specific place and "bring it home" with me, so to say. I mean that when I return home, my home feels slightly altered and I can still feel the particular atmosphere of the place I visited before. This then goes away after some time.
I used to have this all the time during my childhood. Now I rarely have it, or I may have it when I visit some new place. Home can also feel different depending from which path I took. Very weird!
Another thing is, I can get mental connections, which I call "atmospheres". For instance, I can look at a photo of an object and I can start sensing the environment (or "atmosphere") of where the object belongs. It's a bit abstract, so I can give an example: I see some colorful Christmas lights, and I imagine a lonely house in a field. There is lots of snow everywhere. The house looks old, but cozy. The house is dark, but in one window you can see some colorful Christmas lights glowing.
I don't mean that this is just me imagening something, I mean that I can actually feel the atmosphere the one photo or object radiates. Does that sound crazy?
Most of the time these "atmospheres" give me a positive feeling. But I can also make some very negative connections. For example, this weekend I saw an abandoned house in the city. The outside walls were full of graffiti. Immediately, it made me feel very uneasy. I started "sensing" junkies taking drugs and other bad things that may have happened in that house. All this made me very panicky and I wanted to get away from that house as fast as possible.
At other times, I can also see a photo or a painting and I will have feelings similar to the ones I had when I saw the house. For some reason, I mostly make connections with drugs, illness and despair (I mean mostly as in concerning the "negative" connections, as I still have the positive ones as well). It's almost as if I by looking at those photos/paintings/objects I was starting to remember something that had happened a long time ago, but never actually remember anything and instead get a general sense of what it felt like. Of course, I don't actually believe I am about to remember something, I'm just describing it like this to illustrate what I mean. I think it's just another malfunction of my over-active brain.
I thought I may have depression, hence the negative feelings, but I was diagnosed only with OCD, lots of anxiety and DP/DR. So I wanted to ask, does anyone ever get similar feelings? Could this be part of derealization?