I made this account about a year or two ago but I thought I was doing better so I left. But I'm not.

For the past two months I have been an empty hollow shell of a human. I don't know what changed because I thought I was getting better for awhile but things just crashed all around me. I don't even remember what emotions are and what they felt like. I also suffer from OCD so every day I am constantly inside my head thinking about different obsessions. My current obsession is what it means to be human and why do humans feel emotions and things. I never even considered things like this before but ever since the thought entered my head I feel so empty inside and in a constant state of emptiness and depression. It's as if I'm some sort of computer program trying to understand humans and it doesn't understand at all. I feel like as if I have completely forgotten what it means to be human.


This scares me (at least the little fear I can experience) because I fear that I have permanently forgotten what it is to be human and I will never gain that understanding back. I'm afraid of turning into some sociopathic logic machine with no idea on how to be human. I don't know what to even do anymore. The thoughts are constantly in my head and every morning I wake up feel empty and I hate it. Has anyone experienced these feelings? Have any of you gotten better? I'm so lost right now. I'm seeing a therapist but it isn't helping.