How to make new friends?

[Star]

I find it very hard to go back to my old 'friends' and am totally at a loss as to find new ones. I have a few internet friends that i chat to every now and again but as nice as they are, they're way to far away to meet up with.

I really dont know where/how/what to do really I'm so worried about my anxiety, i'm 23 for pity's sake and feel like the saddest 23 year old there is, i see all my old friends pictures on facebook and stuff and get a bit envious that they're out having fun while i'm holding myself back and suffering. please dont tell me that i'll have to suck it up and go back to my old friends because they are extremally judgemental and dont 'get' whats up with me because its 'all in my head' hmmm its all a bit GAHHHHH!!!!!! (shut up Star!)

[nomorepanic]

I met new friends at some strange places ...

a diet club

the swimming pool

an exercise class

the gym

at work

There are always new people out there to meet if you are prepared to take the time and effort to go out and meet them.

Maybe join a club that interests you so you have something to talk about as well.

[Melina]

Hi there,
When taking some time off work due to anxiety I met some lovely geninue people where I did some volunteer work. I also made some friends at Salsa class. It has helped me meeting people with similar interests which gives you the foundation to start and develop a friendship

[psychofatale]

Hi there,

I am new to the site so forgive me as I dont really know anything about you, but I have been in a similar position to you too. I lost my 'old' friends and didnt feel there was a way back to them but also felt at a loss as to how I was going to meet 'new' friends. I dont have any concrete answers for you, but I wondered if you work, or have children/a partner etc? Its just that sometimes we meet people and make friends without thinking about it, I have realised that I myself am actually a natural loner and enjoy my own company most of the time, but I still need other people to have fun with etc. I have always found friends at social places such as a college course I went on, I made freinds simply because we saw each other everyday and nodded hello and then the friendship was formed. Do you have any interests or social activities that bring you into contact with potential 'friends'?

[Lozzie]

Hi Star

I know exactly how you feel, im 22 and because alot of my friends havent heard of anxiety and dont really understand I lost contact with most of them due to not being able to go out.
It is horrible when you realise that actually you only have a few good friends left, but id rather have a few good friends then a load of friends im not that close too
I too feel exactly like you and if ur the saddest 23 year old then im the saddest 22 year old you are not alone in the way you feel hun
If you want a chat feel free to reply to the pm i have sent you
Take care
Laura xxxx

[belle]

Hi..
If you're the saddest 23 year old, i am definitely the saddest 32 year old.
I have NO friends left since i got sick. I work in a pub so i "meet" people all the time, but because i'm not able to go out, whats the point of forming friendships?

I suppose i'll just get on without having friends.

x

[honeybee3939]

Hi Star

You could try your local library also, they usually have a list of all the social events arranged in your area. I joined a local walking group and enjoy it so much, i have met some lovely people there.

Love

Andrea
xxxxx

[Jen84]

Hi Star

I could have written that post myself, I'm in the same position as you, seeing my friends facebook pics etc. It actually makes things worse, i do have a few close friends which is lovely but i do understand. I dont really have any suggestions as Im struggling as well but I wanted to let you know you're not alone. PM me if you want maybe we (and Laura) should form a group - Saddest 22/23years olds!! Just kidding we're great!!

Jen

[lucy0927]

I too could have written that post about me (apart from the fact i'm 25!), I have 1 or 2 close friends, a few colleagues at work that I get on with but apart from that I don't speak to any of my old friends from school. I put it down to the fact that I'm terrible at keeping in touch and I just lose common interests with people. Again I registered on facebook recently and saw all my old friends with lots of people they knew on their profile while mine is pretty low on the friends count. It made me feel very sad and pretty low for a few days but then I realised it was just who I am.

I don't make friends easily but them that take the time to get to know me and who stick around are the ones worth knowing.

I'd love to join a social group and it's something that I think I'm seriously going to look into. I'm tempted to start a night class or something else and I'm going to give it serious thought if nothing else to get me out of a routine and out the house.

Remember it's not how many friends you have, it's the 1 or 2 close friends you have that really count - surely that's all we need anyway!

[Gordon]

I have literally hundreds of online friends but friends locally in real life I can count on one hand. There are only 4 people who I'm really close to and can trust. The others are just acquaintances that I speak to from time to time.

I'm stuck in a slightly rural area so the opportunities for clubs and meetings and things are slim and I don't drive due to my illness. I can get into town but not that often.

When I do meet people I can make friends easily as I'm a nice person but it's difficult to get out there to do it.

Gordon