Hi all, hope you can help!

I'm 49, have bipolar 2 which was diagnosed when I was 23, having suffered from severe depression since I was 18. I have only had a few truly 'manic' episodes, but have suffered mainly from the depression, severe generalised anxiety...after an armed robbery at my home when I was 33, I was also diagnosed with PTSD. I see a psychiatrist on a 3 monthly basis and have also had CBT.

Sadly after a long spell of 15 years when I was well enough to hold down a full time job, my mental health deteriorated and I have been unable to work since 2014...I've been on ESA Support Group since then. Also in 2014 my private landlord sold the flat to a developer...who promptly more than doubled the rent. My housing benefit would no longer cover even half of the monthly rent, so I joined the council housing list and finally moved into a flat in August 2016. It is in a block of 4, I live on the top floor with one flat below me.

I was very happy here until November 2017. I'm in a LDR with my fiance, who works in London. It was his birthday at the beginning of the month and he spent it with me. On the night of his birthday we were listening to music through Chromecast, in the living room, until about 1.30am.

The next morning the downstairs neighbour was playing music so loudly through his stereo that the floors were shaking and his speakers were distorting. Although annoying, I wasn't too surprised as he regularly does it at weekends. However, later that night my fiance went to put rubbish in the bin cupboard, and as he was passing the neighbours door, he came out and started yelling and swearing at my fiance. He's has a very strong accent and is very hard to understand, but we got the general idea that he was accusing my fiance of 'walking too heavily' around my flat. He repeatedly swore at my fiance and called him an '********'. I was so upset and stressed that I ended up having severe chest pains the next morning, had an ECG and was immediately referred to a cardiologist as it was thought I had had a mild heart attack. Luckily further tests showed that wasn't the case, it had been a very severe panic attack.

I contacted the housing association and asked them to record what had happened.

In the five months since it's taken me a long time to feel comfortable in my flat again. For the first couple of months I was tiptoeing around the flat like a ghost, too scared to make any sort of noise. It got to the point that if I needed to go to the toilet in the middle of the night, I would delay it as long as possible...I even missed a couple of important hospital appointments as my downstairs neighbour was chatting in the hall and I didn't want to have to see him/go past him. I've been scared to leave the flat on numerous occasions.

Just before Christmas myself and fiance ran into the downstairs neighbour outside the block of flats. He virtually ignored me, but was ranting and swearing at my fiance, telling him he needed to 'walk quieter' around my flat. In the end I told him that we'd heard him, and that there was no need to be nasty.

My fiance was up over Easter and on the Saturday night made a meal for us. At one point it sounded like the downstairs neighbour was shouting...and at the end I caught the word '********'....was a bit worried but tried to think it wasn't aimed at us. The next day fiance was coming back in the building, downstairs neighbour opened his door as he went past it and said 'watch the noise, ********'....

I feel like I'm back at square one. My reaction hasn't been as severe as last time, but I am back to creeping around the flat. My anxiety levels are through the roof again. My fiance only comes to visit me once a month, staying for about 3/4 days at a time. I have carpets and very large area rugs everywhere, we don't wear shoes around the flat, the tv is low and we have subtitles on all the time. The worst part is that the downstairs neighbour himself is regularly very noisy. All of last summer he was out between the hours of 4pm to 1am, leaving his large dog inside the flat. The poor thing used to bark for most of that time. When he'd return, he'd be banging around his flat until 2am. He also smokes very strong pot very regularly, stinking the whole building out with it. It's this that makes me not want to talk to him directly...especially as I'm here alone 90% of the time.

What I'm most worried about is that I'm going to be away visiting a relative for a week next month. I have a friend looking after my two cats for the first 3 days, then my fiance is coming up for the next 4. I'm worried that the downstairs neighbour is going to realise he's here and there's going to be trouble. This is the first time I've had any time away since I moved here...how can I control my anxiety?