Okay. I have posted separate posts about my derealization/depersonalization feelings. I’ve gotten some good uplifting answers but I’m putting all of my symptoms in this post, and if anyone thinks I’m right about it being DR/DP please tell me!
So firstly, I have had a symptom my whole life. I always told myself that it had to do with my chronic illness, POTS. I thought it was dizziness but now I feel otherwise. Sometimes out of nowhere I have a terrible terrible feeling, like my brain isn’t working, like I’m dying or dreaming. I can be laughing with friends, eating dinner, watching tv, anything, when suddenly a feeling hits me where I feel completely out of it. Like I was knocked into a dream. Like suddenly the world around me isn’t real, and everything is lacking depth. So having POTS, I had a hard childhood, never felt normal, never felt too happy. My family life was okay, yet my dad had anger issues. So I’m thinking if this is DR Or DP it came from stress. Anyways, I’d get these feelings out of no where or when I would have anxiety about the those feelings, yet they were not constant and could come and go sometimes not having an epsiode for months.
The past year was rough. I was emotionally unstable because of home life. When I was stressed out I started to feel weird. But it wasn’t too bad, just felt kind of like I wasn’t connected with anyone, like I didn’t love the people that I know I do love. After that, I felt déjà vu dozens of times a day and it was so strange. So a month or so later I smoked pot. I know people with my chronic illness who say it’s a miracle and help them greatly. At this time I thought I was feeling strange because of my chronic illness so I gave pot a try to try and help myself. Worst decision ever. I puffed about six or seven times. When suddenly everything around me looked like it was closing in on itself, then I passed out. The feeling I had when I woke up a few seconds later was like the first symptom I described to you, yet heightened to one thousand percent. Everything that was familiar around me, the room, my mom, they all felt distant, like I didn’t really know them at all. I couldn’t feel my body at all and I kept going in and out of consciousness. My memory would lapse ever few seconds. I was trying to remind myself where I was but I kept on forgetting and my heart rate was so high I could hear it in my head. This last for two hours. And after that I haven’t been the same. It’s been five months, and I’m constantly feeling disconnected from reality. Nothing seems real to me and it’s extremly hard on my period and when I feel my period coming. It is worse for me with my POTS symptoms and this weird new symptom. I had to drop out of school anD I was bedridden for the past four months. But recently I’ve forced myself up everyday and I’ve only just started in home therapy sessions. Now if you got to the end of this can someone please please tell me if this is normal DR or DP. I’m losing myself and I dont know what else to do. It’s like I don’t even know who I am anymore. Thanks.
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Originally Posted by scoobieduke
