Hello,

I am sorry, I don't know if this is the right forum to post stuff like this and if it is not - delete it, I guess. I struggle with panic attacks and OCD and have been lurking on this forum a lot but now I need some support/coping strategies, but most importantly; advice on something entirely different.

To start off; I'm 21. My mom and her partner have been together for over a year now and he makes her very happy. In fact, up until now, he seemed like an absolute dream; he helps us in every way possible and just seems like a sensitive and great man all around. Seeing her happy made me very happy too; just knowing that she finally has someone by her side (I don't have a father or any siblings). Every now and then he would make explicit sexual jokes or compliment me on my legs and other small things that would make me a little uncomfortable but I brushed it off as him having a crude sense of humour. There have been a few occasions where he hugged me a bit too tight (basically squeezed me to his chest so tight I almost lost my breath and not let me go,all while kissing my cheek/neck) when my mom was not around and although that made me feel extremely uncomfortable I tried to brush it off as him being overly affectionate... This next part is explicit.

Today I've been alone with him. When he was about to leave he hugged me waaay too tightly again except this time he would not let me go. Instead he just kept hugging me and insisting I kiss him on the cheek too - I expressed I was uncomfortable but he would not let go, when I tried to get away he grabbed me from behind lifted my shirt and touched me all over my stomach and then proceeded to grope my breasts under my shirt for quite a few seconds. I froze, but somehow managed to tell him I was very uncomfortable. He kept breathing into my ear and would not let me go. When he finally did let go, he jokingly said not to mention anything to my mom.

And I don't want to, since my mom has a lot of other issues and stressors in her life right now and knowing her personality and character - this would ruin her. But I don't know how to cope with this, I feel alone, violated and distressed. Does anyone have any solid advice on how to handle this situation?

Again, I am sorry if this does not belong here, but as you can imagine I have no one to talk to about this and just need advice. Thanks in advance.