worried about my eyes

[lef93]

Hi

Sorry I seem to be posting a lot lately, I think I have hit a bit of a patch. I was diagnosed with astigmatism last year, but I suspect I may have keratoconus. I know that this is treatable for many people, but for me this is kind of a worst nightmare as I am extremely squeamish with eyes, the opticians have actually said that they have never met someone quite as bad as me, I wimper even when they touch my eyelids. Contact lenses...even doing eyeliner, all of it makes me feel ill.

For the most part, I chalked all of my issues down to astigmatism. I have haloes around lights, severe light sensitivity, double vision (worse when moving eyes), issues with lights when moving my eyes (It sort of trails a bit especially traffic lights) starbursts around lights and issues with stripes, anything of a patterned nature moves and I get these diagonal lines from it. My actual eyesight though is clear, I just have distortions mostly revolving around light.

This was all fine, but then I noticed a new symptom that has worried me as I have only seen it as related to keratoconus. If I look at a little led light in the dark, the further away I get it actually distorts from its circular shape into something else, as though it is refracting from many angles. It actually looks triangular rather than circular. I have never heard of this with astigmatism, so I am very worried as the concept of having anything wrong with my eyes makes me feel physically ill.

The only reason I ever worried about keratoconus was because I am severely allergic and I went through a period of rubbing my eyes for about 2-3 years, mostly around the corner but the allergies were uncontrollable at the time.

Has anyone had the led light issue with astigmatism?

Thank you

[Scass]

Sorry, I haven’t had it.
I am a terrible eye rubber though due to allergies too.
When did you last have your eyes tested?


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[lef93]

Hi

I had my eyes tested around a year ago, they confirmed astigmatism, something like 1 in one eye and 0.5 in the other. I explained my worries to them and they said they aren't worried, obviously they looked at my eyes with the light too.

I think I am worried because some symptoms have become more intense over the year, mostly with light. I get worried that maybe they don't know what keratoconus is and don't look for it.

Basically led lights are the main issue, and the only way I can describe it is I just cannot get my eyes to focus on the light. It is different slightly in both eyes, but close up I can see a circle, and as I step further away it warps out into more of a horizontal oblong blob with glares coming out of it. It just looks a little odd and concerns me I suppose.

[Selivan]

I happen to have mild astigmatism too and to perceive the exact same distortion that you're describing. It used to worry me a lot too but I've learned to ignore it. Hang in there.

[lef93]

Hi,

I hate being so worried about this, but this one doesn't seem to be budging and I am concerned.

Last week I went to the opticians after my worry (I used to rub my eyes a bit, mostly around the corners but I was still worried after I developed astigmatism last year). They cannot diagnose it there as far as I understand, but they looked at my eyes and said I have nothing to worry about but I do have dry eye and blepharitis at the moment. My prescription for astigmatism increased by 0.25 over the year, so I am -1, -0.75. They told me not to worry as my prescription is so low, and I am 24 and it is usually a teenage thing to suddenly get a high astigmatism and then it may be keratoconus, but I have read things before about people with keratoconus going to the opticians and being told the exact same, so I didn't leave fully reassured, mainly because they cannot confirm or deny, they can just assume.

My concern is that I have a couple of symptoms that I am not sure are related to normal astigmatism, and just wondered if people with normal astigmatism get this.


When I see traffic lights (the green one only) I don't see it normally. I see about six lights all overlapping into a green star like blob, and as I get closer it slowly merges into one circular light.

When I look at an led clock (lit up times) my ghosting is pretty bad. I have a time and a little clock symbol underneath the time. In each eye there will be a separate ghost symbol of the clock 2-4 times, and the numbers are so horizontally mushed together they almost glow off of the clock surface to the side. There is a glow above the numbers too.


In general life I don't really have vision issues, apart from the odd ghosting around bright objects it is just really with lights.


Has anyone with astigmatism ever had this? I have only heard of astigmatism causing slight doubling/ slight ghosting etc and nothing like this, but I am unsure if I am just a little too conscious of my vision and maybe many people get this, or it is a sign of something worse like keratoconus. I don't really know what to do if it is a legitimate worry, because I don't think opticians can do much.

[nomorepanic]

Hi

This is just a courtesy reply to let you know that your thread was merged with another of your threads.

Please when posting on similar topics add it onto your previous post rather than starting a new one.

It is nothing personal it is just to make it easier for people to follow your story and to give you advice as a whole.

[jenny649]

hi there! i can very much relate to what youre talking about on all fronts. my eyes/vision have been a huge source of anxiety for me lately and i was actually worried about keratoconus after an increase in astigmatism and noticing some of the same things you mentioned. its crazy to find someone worried about the same disease because literally no one else i talked to about it had ever heard of it lol. the traffic light thing totally happens to me at night. if it makes you feel better, i kinda went anxiety crazy with the keratoconus and had two topographies done, one by a cornea specialist both of which assured me i have absolutely no signs of keratoconus - just an increase in regular astigmatism. and i am 28 so even older than you. it apparently happens.

if you are really concerned, a topography is a really quick test and a pretty definitive way to rule out keratoconus. ive had an optometrist and an opthamologist do it so i think either can.

[lef93]

thank you for the response- I am getting a bit obsessed with it too, but I have found very few people complaining of seeing more than doubles...its just odd to me because many people with astigmatism complain about virtually everything around them having double edges...and for me it isn't even that bad, I see double edges occasionally its mainly lights.
I think it is because astigmatism and keratoconus do give off very similar visual symptoms, so it is hard to distinguish between them. I keep looking up keratoconus visual simulations and thinking that they look a bit like mine, but then astigmatism simulations can come up with the exact same pictures so I have sat there thinking, which one is it? I end up convincing myself that because I am seeing something similar and because I am the typical allergic type then I must have keratoconus. I never really noticed how bad my vision was with lights until I looked with one eye instead of both...my digital clock is fine up close but from far away in pitch black I seem to see four/five ghostings completely blurred above and some from the side. I am also having really bad dry eye which isn't being relieved with drops so I imagine that isn't helping much either.

I do agree that I think a corneal topography is the only way of getting an answer- it definitely isn't healthy to keep checking how I see with one eye closed and then seeing how it weighs up with simulations. Do they have to touch your eye in any way? I am very squeamish with eyes... the other day the optician said she could see the surface of my eyes were dry and she wanted to examine them with dye to see just how bad they were... and we tried but she couldn't even get dye in my eye...that is why I am so scared of something like keratoconus because your eye would probably have to be touched a lot.


I have no idea how to go about arranging those things, my family was very stressed with me last week for worrying about keratoconus, I think many people with health anxiety know that it can affect people around us. When I was told by the optician not to worry I did explain to my parents that it doesn't necessarily mean I don't have it, they just see it as 'unlikely', they were kind of frustrated...so I feel I have to be a bit careful looking into it...

Sorry about the long message, usually if I have health anxiety stuff I keep it to myself, look back a day later and think 'I didn't need to worry about that' but this one seems to be staying with me, probably because eye stuff terrifies me a bit!

[jenny649]

dont worry at all about the long message, i can relate to /a lot/ of what youre saying and its nice to know im not alone. i check my vision constantly in a lot of different ways (testing my peripheral vision, testing differences in acuity/color in each eye). i really do think ive gotten dry eye and eye strain from checking my vision so much. i can also relate to family & friends getting frustrated and stressed as well. ive been worried about a lot of different eye diseases and have been to tons of opthamologists and optometrists in the past few months...basically all of them told me not to worry about it and my family cannot understand why im still worrying about it. they also get stressed and upset and worried about me too and i feel so bad for putting them through it. so im totally with you on that, it can be so hard. im frustrated with myself too but the anxiety/checking/going to doctors feels so compulsive sometimes.

the topography is really painless and doesnt involve touching your eye at all. its basically just putting your head up to a machine and a little camera takes a picture of your eye. the most uncomfortable part if that you have to hold your eye open for like 10 seconds without blinking so they get the full picture. i got one at the optometrist by basically asking for one lol..i said i was seeing lights at night weird and was worried something was wrong with my cornea and wanted a topography. i think she got the sense i was an anxious person and agreed to it thinking it would help calm me down. unfortunately i just ended up not trusting the results because shes an optometrist and i convinced myself that she may have just missed it. eventually i went to an ophthalmologist who was a cornea specialist and she really went into depth showing me my topography, explaining what she would look for in keratoconus, and showed that i didnt have the signs. i think its tough. tests dont always make us feel better, i finally believed i didnt have keratoconus but have moved on to worries about other eye diseases and have another ophthalmologist appt friday. but sometimes it helps to cross at least one thing off your list.

[B3521]

Not sure if it helps but I'm going through some major eye anxiety atm. I have very sever astigmatism and with one eye closed I have a sort of blind spot in one eye. I feel like a see straight lines with "kinks" in them. I've read this is a symptom of macular degeneration or a retina /brain problem. I've been to the optician twice who said my eyes look healthy with no problems but I can see it and am convinced I "can't" see. :-(

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